#COVER DESIGN@!!! FORMATTING!! EXCITING!@

[lisafication]

This post is uh, extremely normal I swear

So hello yes I am absolutely On My Bullshit regarding my new favourite game. 

That’s right, it’s the cannibal incest game, The Coffin of Andy and Leyley. And I’m here to shove five thousand words of pretentious analysis down your throat because, and I do not exaggerate, I think it is one of, if not the best written game I have ever played. And I have played a lot of games, including Baldur’s Gate 3, Final Fantasy XIV and Undertale, to name a few narrative luminaries to come to mind.

That wordcount is not an exaggeration. My brainworms are extremely powerful and now you can share them with me as I walk you through my insane skyscraper of inference-driven analysis.

Or you can click away. I really wouldn’t blame you, it’s quite a lot.

Content Warnings: …Yes?

(To drop the bit for a moment, The Coffin of Andy and Leyley covers extremely disturbing material and challenges you to examine aspects of living in this world that many have taken for granted all their life, it is not a comfortable game, this will cover similar topics and will often echo the game’s unremitting scepticism on basic principles of society and humanity and you should look after yourself first. My Content Warning is framed as a joke, but it’s also quite real in that the game is designed to make you uncomfortable and there’s no shame in that not being for you.)

This was originally posted on and formatted for Sufficient Velocity, and you can probably more easily read and discuss it with me here.

With that said, let’s dig in. I have had to split this into multiple posts because tumblr will only allow so many images. There will be spoilers for all endings.

She’s excited, are you?

It’s All About Ashley

It really is, isn’t it? I mean, for approximately eighty percent of the total game as currently released and the entirety of Episode 1, you’re in control of Ashley, just as she’s in control of her and Andrew’s relationship for 80% of the game, up until the various ending sequences where it begins to slip. The only other characters who really matter at all in and of themselves are Andrew and her mother — and the former is under her thumb, and she eats the latter. It’s all about Ashley. Even her obsession with Andrew is, ultimately, about Ashley.

But who is Ashley? What is Ashley? Why is Ashley, even? Let’s take a look.

Ashley as presented to us in Episode 1 is very straightforward, so let’s list off the traits we’re given — she is malicious, she is fearless, she lacks empathy, she doesn’t have anything resembling a conscience, she demands Andrew belong to her and her alone, she has him at her beck and call.

In Episode 2, we’re ostensibly shown how she has him at her beck and call— she leverages the threat of reporting Nina’s death over him and had him swear to be with her forever. We’re shown that even as a child she was “just, like that” — but as a child, she hadn’t learnt to live with it yet, to laugh at the farce of it all.

Yeah, exactly like that!

And she does this throughout Episode 1 — The Coffin of Andy and Leyley is a remarkably silly game much of the time, finding moments of absurdity and levity against a backdrop blacker than pitch — and most of the time, your internal narration is coming from Ashley and the jokes will not-infrequently come at her own expense.

She will later get negged by her human sacrifice for her poor ritual circle drawing

Her reaction to being told that her soul is as dark and viscous as tar is “You guess you already knew that” — it’s confirmation to her, not new information. Ashley knows who she is. But who taught her this? There’s layers to this, nothing in this game is as simple and straightforward as it appears at first sight, which is why I’ve been obsessing over it for days.

While it’s common in fiction, the truth of the matter is, most ‘bad people’ really do think they’re good people. But Ashley has never once thought of herself as a good person — or perhaps better put as a person worthy of love — as we learn across Episodes 1 & 2, with our flashbacks to Andy and Leyley and the VERY VERY QUIET!!!

I really wish I had space in this essay to talk about this, but I’d like to touch on these being traits usually more easily forgiven in young boys than young girls at some point.

If she removes all other options, only then can she expect him to like her.

This is something that is echoed in the modern day — her seeming self-assurance is easily shaken and she reaches out to the world — usually Andrew — to affirm and validate her, soothing her insecurities, using any tool she deems necessary. Even when her life is on the line when Andrew has her by the throat at the climax of Episode 1, the only ‘compelling reason’ she can give Andrew to not kill her is her ability to soothe his nightmares. When he tells her there are sleeping pills for that…

Most people would have a bit more to argue for their existence.

While she, unlike Andrew, acknowledges having had friends before the quarantine… you know she’s got a point that they didn’t even bother to answer her calls, that was clearly not something the state was interfering with given Andrew’s calls with his mother and his girlfriend, and given her general demeanour it’s not hard to imagine that… they weren’t ever very close. When we see her and Nina talk in the infamous ‘box scene’, it’s clear that Nina doesn’t like her very much, despite Andrew’s assessment of Nina as being one of Ashley’s friends.

We see further support for her general lack of companionship in her dream sequence in the Burial route — Leyley and Leyley Alone. No matter what you do, you can’t place the pink plushy at the family table, the flowers won’t bloom if you give the Julia and Nina plushies her own as a companion instead of Andrew’s — and if you’re bold enough to go for the ‘incest route’, in the ‘Love’ room you see that no one ever looks happy to be with her in the childlike depictions of her history, nor is she happy in turn, save for when she’s with Andrew. In a bit of heavy-handed metaphor, the player then overwrites all of these tense, upset, hard moments with Andrew, having him fill in for everyone else in life — and happy with her.

Once Upon A Lousy Life…

THE END

And that’s why she needs him to affirm her, because no one else ever has and no one else ever will. It’s even included in their comic beats — when the siblings are getting along well, they’ll often play a game where Andrew dramatically overpraises Ashley while she demands more; it’s a comedic bit but I mean — it really does matter to her!

For the record, she opened a door. She gets a little heart in a speech bubble after this exchange.

We have a great example of this dynamic, that of insecurity and affirmation, in Episode 1, after Andrew has killed for her, butchered for her, his girlfriend broke up with her, he’s seemingly thrown his entire life away for her… she’s still insecure over her relationship with him, she’s uncertain of her control and she needs him to reaffirm it for her.

This is her victory, surely?

Andrew affirms her once, with his usual dead-eyed look.

But she's still not so sure.

He actively reaches out to affirm her again with cheer.

Look how happy she is!

While it’s most obvious and clear cut here, it’s hardly the only case. Let’s look back to the aftermath of Andy and Leyley and the VERY VERY QUIET!!! (I’m not using the other name). Leyley is, after similarly extreme acts — he murdered a girl and hid her body for her — convinced Andy doesn’t like her and she needs this leverage to keep him around, to meet her basic needs for survival. Because that’s what this is — she receives no care of affection elsewhere, so she forces it out of the only source she sees available through the means she sees as necessary.

I really hope we see some of their earlier childhood in Episode 3

What exactly made her like this? Was it just neglect, or something more specific…

She needs this to be the case because otherwise she doesn’t believe he’d stay.

This pattern repeats throughout — Ashley’s insecurities are hit on and she reaches out to Andy to affirm that she is not alone, and she will use any and every tool to exploit her ostensible control over him and force him to be what she needs him to be — and as long as she has that, as long as she is everything to him and it’s not possible for him to leave, she’s happy. As long as she thinks he loves her in her very particular, very peculiar view of love, she’s content, come what may. As long as Andy and Leyley are together, they can take on the world.

Let’s talk about that view of love, because there’s always more layers to unpack here I’m only scratching the surface with this essay — Ashley consistently refers to anyone else Andrew may have befriended or spent time with as a whore, a slut, a bitch — highly gendered insults that bring to mind the idea that he’s cheating in some way. But it’s not even about sex — when Andrew mentions that their parents had friends, she accuses them of cheating on each other in the same way!

There’s a lot to unpack about Ashley’s view of femininity and the role the patriarchy plays in their relationship.

Any kind of emotional engagement, any kind of commitment, any kind of life outside of your significant other is, to Ashley, cheating. Because that’s what she needs from Andrew, a seeming complete and total commitment, secure in her place as the only thing in his life, because she cannot understand anyone picking her if they have a choice.

This insecurity she has in her relationship is what drives her to empower the trinket — he can’t leave her as long as she can protect him with prophetic dreams, after all. She needs every kind of leverage she can get because until she succeeds in being everything to him, in devouring him so completely she has him in her thrall mind, body and soul she can’t be sure of herself — hell, her dream sequence in Burial has you placing Andrew’s signature green plushy, ‘the best thing in the world’ in a cage far away from anything else.

Ultimately, it really is all about Ashley — even her seeming obsession with Andrew ultimately comes back to her own insecurities. If she is everything to ‘the best thing in the world’, some of that ‘best’ must surely reflect on her! 

But that’s enough about the more normal, straightforward and understandable sibling. 

That was not a joke.

Andrew’s Rank 100 Deception

The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he did not exist.

Let me explain.

You might have noticed that in the previous section I often use language such as ‘ostensibly’ or ‘seemingly’ to describe Andy and Leyley’s relationship, and there’s a good reason for that. From the beginning of the game through to its end, Andrew is lying to you, the player, without ever falsely representing or misinforming you about events that occurred.

The common, or obvious ‘initial take’ on Andrew as presented in Episode 1 is fairly straightforward. The game primes you to think this way, it frames things and strings reveals just right so as to make it very easy to overlook the incongruities it introduces in Episode 2. He’s a victim. Plain and simple, Ashley is his abuser and he is her victim and would be fine, a normal albeit kinda depressed guy without her.

It really is not a difficult conclusion to draw

You can go all the way through the game, have him try to accept his mother’s olive branch and enter the Decay route as a method for him to finally actualise his desire to get out from Ashley’s thumb and it makes sense, it’s a reasonable way for the story to go, given his character.

You see him this way because the game primes you in Episode 1 to view their relationship like Andrew does — he’s lying. He’s lying to himself, he’s lying to Ashley and he’s so good at it — Deception Rank 100 — he even lies to you. Without misrepresenting a single event or otherwise misleading you directly, the game gets you to buy into his preferred self-perception. Nina? Ashley. Julia? Ashley. The murders they commit in the course of the game? Ashley, Ashley, Ashley, it’s not his fault he’s not to blame he’s just a doormat at the beck and call of his demonic sister.

But he wants to be there. From the very outset, the very first puzzle, that’s made clear. Does anyone else remember this exchange, from right at the beginning of the game?

Ashley wants to investigate the music!

Andrew disapproves…

…Or does he?! 

Like. Listen. Okay. You do not frown when saying ‘Nope’ and then smile when saying that you’ll instead tag along if they do it if your heart is at all in the no. That’s not an objection, that’s using Ashley as his excuse. Especially if you immediately throw her the balcony key that she could not possibly have gotten from you by force (more on Andrew’s ability to use force later).

This is the very first time you control both characters together with Andrew following Ashley instead of off on his own, the first adventure, the first puzzle! 

But put a pin in that for now, let’s talk about his initial framing in Episode 2 first. Episode 1 has set us up to, generally speaking, believe the superficial framing of the siblings as portrayed in its promotional art:

The question that we then ask, right at the heart of it is… why is he a doormat? We explore this in his dream sequence in Episode 2, which does make it clear that the boy’s not okay but— it’s real easy, given the priming from Episode 1 to make you think that he’s the one with the originally functional moral compass, to think that that him being fucked up is damage done to him by Nina’s death and being bound to Ashley for his entire life. She corrupted him.

But, well, is that the case?

You're primed to ignore this as manipulation (which it is) but the best manipulation has some truth to it.

Precisely two things spur Andrew to action in the entire game, consistently — they are the fear of consequences and Ashley. And the first incident of that fear, the very first time we’re shown his seeming moral compass as a kid — the first time it’s really hammered home that it’s a fear of consequences rather than any true moral qualms is after Nina’s death. And why does he fear consequences here?

……

The ‘natural’ read that many take away from this sequence, particularly those who have only played Decay, is that Ashley browbeat him into doing this against his will, using emotional blackmail to overwhelm his objections, and then used the event itself to bind him to her forever as her personal doormat.

In a strict sense, this is true. But this doesn’t match up with the details, something the game uses shock to encourage you to overlook. That outburst is before any kind of threat has been made, and absolutely nothing either of them say anything about it being morally bad until Ashley weaponises ‘you’re a bad person’ against Andrew — morality didn’t seem to enter his mind or the equation at all until Ashley brought it up. More than that, his greatest fear and driving motivation even prior to that is, as shown above, being taken away from Ashley.

She, of course, recognises this and uses it against him. But she never needed to, it didn’t change anything about Andrew’s attachment to her, it was there to address her own insecurities.

Just like to touch on how a lot of his affirmations are preceded by him confirming her insecurities.

I adore this phrasing

There’s a second prong to this as well, to the question of ‘who really calls the shots here’ because — Andrew can, at any stage, apply an ‘ultimate veto’ of physical violence. The game is very clear to the player that that is on the table — even when they were children, when Andy swears their blood oath, he briefly considers killing her — and take note of how he ultimately got a ‘winning’ condition out of her by not specifying there wouldn’t be others and she is forced to accept that, there. Even outside of their most serious confrontations, Ashley is portrayed as having to convince, manipulate or otherwise coerce Andrew into going along with her schemes — she really can’t make him do anything, she doesn’t have the supremacy in violence and, to a lesser extent, capability that would allow her to. 

Andrew, you are like ten years old.

The truth of the matter is, Ashley can only make Andrew do anything because he lets her. I don’t mean in the sense that I’m saying abuse victims let their abusers emotionally abuse them, I mean in the sense that he is clearly considering his options on the table and choosing to discard those that could stop her, or bring an end to any of this. He needs her.

But it’s true that he hates her, too. He has to hate her, because if he doesn’t hate her, if he isn’t forced to have done this, that means… he’s responsible. And nothing, at the start of the story, is as important to Andrew as avoiding the consequences of his own actions, not even Ashley. By the midpoint, he loves her, he hates her, he can’t live without her, he wants to kill her — by the end… well, that depends if you’re on Decay or Burial, but more on that in a bit.

A great scene to study for this dynamic is the climax of Episode 1, when Andrew grabs Ashley by the throat and considers strangling her to death. She’s pushed him too far with hurtful words and assault, and he’s seemingly had enough.

It’s still framed as a question of risk, of consequences happening to him. 

Like, this is not the usual behaviour of someone who’s been pushed past their breaking point.

He tells Ashley that he wants to kill her, because she’s just going to throw another fit and that’s a risk to him. She is… not framed as being able to fight back (she does have a gun here, and more on that in a later essay, maybe). He’s so calculated in how he approaches his use of violence here, which isn’t at all what you’d expect of someone about to commit a crime of passion… but it’s very easy to overlook because of the abuser/victim narrative that the player fits his behaviour into the narrative that the game primes them to accept, brushing incongruities under the carpet.

At the start of Episode 2, we get to control Andrew for the first time, and the first obvious holes in his cover start to show. Some of this is optional — you only learn that he’s been faking having nightmares in order to share a bed with Ashley if you choose to go back into the motel room and check the bed, for example — but not all of it.

----(See reblogs for the second half)

[shyalia]

Attention The Day the World Broke readers and fan artists!

Heya! In case you missed it, I am working on formatting the absolutely show-stopping TMNT horror AU The Day the World Broke by @saladmix into a set of PHYSICAL BOOKS!! Because of its high word count, it would be split into the three different acts:

Act One: Chapters 1-13

Act Two: Chapters 14-30

Act Three: Chapters 31-TBD

SO MY QUESTION TO YOU!! If you have made fanart for this fic, please let me know whether or not you would be okay with it being included in the books (with credit, of course!) They would be included with the corresponding act in which the scene/moment takes place.

And don't worry, once completed, the files will be made available for those who wish to print their own copies. ^-^

Also! Don't forget to take a look at @up-the-anti's AMAZING cover designs for this project. I'm so excited to see these become a reality!

[beepboopkek]

— Practice makes perfect (F!Reader) [Part two]

Including: Dr.Ratio x F!Reader

Part One is here

M!Reader version has been posted on both ao3 and tumblr as well!

cw: ! NSFW ! , F!Reader, established relationship, b0tt0m!sub!reader x d0m!t0p!ratio , fluff and smut, soft dr ratio, he's called veritas, oral F recieving, light cursing, hot spring freaking, aftercare, lmk if I missed anything

w/c: 2.8k

a/n: the long awaited part two to the dr ratio fic!! probably not what you guys are expecting but i like myself some soft ratio content too so ... also i apologise sincerely for any formatting mistakes, I decided I would post tonight, fell sick, still decided to go to my pc and post it and then . my pc stopped responding . so now I'm on phone rip,, anyway I hope you enjoy!

NSFW BELOW THE CUT

After your impromptu romp together, you somehow managed to get all the questions right—but not without significant struggle. Every wrong answer had earned you a “punishment” that left your cheeks burning and your body aching in ways that were both mortifying and thrilling. The aftermath of your study session was a blur of sore muscles, a tender lower half, and your boyfriend’s sheepish but endearing attempts to make amends with a parade of apologetic gifts. Which eventually led the two of you to decide to escape the chaos of your work lives for a while, booking a short trip to the Xianzhou Luofu.

Reaching there was easy enough, with Veritas’ connection to the IPC, a shuttle was already booked and the hotel reservations were made well in advance. The hotel was nestled in a quiet corner of Aurum Alley, the Luofu’s vibrant culinary street bustling with tantalizing aromas and lively chatter. It was Veritas’ first choice for a good reason—the hotel was renowned for its luxurious indoor hot springs, a favorite among tourists visiting the Luofu for the first time. Veritas, ever the planner, seemed thoroughly content ensuring everything was perfectly set for your stay.

On the day of your arrival, you were promptly escorted to your rooms, where the welcoming scent of fresh herbs and subtle incense greeted you. The two of you wasted no time settling in, quickly changing into swimsuits to prepare for the highlight of the trip—an exclusive session at the indoor hot spring that Veritas had, unsurprisingly, pre-booked well in advance. The thought of sinking into the warm, sparkling waters after a long journey made you feel a little more relaxed already. As you adjusted the straps of your swimsuit, you couldn’t help but notice Veritas’ smug smile, clearly proud of his meticulous planning.

As you stepped into the indoor hot spring area, the atmosphere immediately shifted to one of relaxation. The air was warm and thick with a gentle mist, carrying the soothing scent of eucalyptus and jasmine. The space was softly lit by lanterns with intricate designs, their golden glow reflecting off the rippling water below. The hot spring itself was a stunning centerpiece, its natural stone edges blending seamlessly with the room’s tranquil aesthetic. The water shimmered with a faint blue-green hue, its surface occasionally disturbed by the gentle flow from a carved stone spout. Surrounding the spring were polished wooden benches and plush white towels neatly folded, ready for use. You spotted a wooden tray with a different array of soaps placed on the stone, presumably for the people that enjoy bathing in the springs. The walls were adorned with elegant scrolls depicting scenes of the Luofu’s rich history. Overhead, bamboo slats covered the ceiling, allowing air to easily pass through the porous wood.

It was quiet, save for the soft trickle of water and the occasional hum of wind from vents designed to maintain the perfect balance of warmth and freshness. Veritas practically lit up as he stepped into the steamy room, his usual calm demeanor giving way to excitement. His sharp features, usually composed in a stoic expression, softened as his gaze darted to the shimmering surface of the hot spring. A smile spread across his face as his eyes met yours.

He shrugged off the towel draped over his shoulders, revealing the drool-worthy cords of muscle, well-defined shoulders flexing at the action. His movements were quick but unhurried, like someone who had been waiting for this moment and couldn’t hide his eagerness any longer.

He shot you a glance over his shoulder and without waiting for an answer, he stepped into the steaming water, his breath hitching slightly as the heat lapped at his skin. A contented sigh escaped his lips as he sank deeper and deeper until the water skimmed across the solid expanse of the middle of his torso, resting his back against the smooth stones of the spring.

“This,” he declared, his smile widening as he tilted his head back to enjoy the warmth, the tips of his violet curls getting soaked in the process, “was definitely worth the trip.” There was something infectious about his excitement—it was rare to see him so unguarded, and you couldn’t help but smile as he gestured for you to join him, splashing the water lightly in your direction.

You stepped cautiously to the edge of the hot spring making sure you didn't accidentally slip and make a fool of yourself, the warm mist curled around your skin as you adjusted the straps of your swimsuit one final time. The heat of the water brushed against your toes as you dipped them in, drawing a soft inhale from you. Slowly, you eased yourself into the spring, the silky warmth enveloping your body inch by inch.

As you sank into the water, your muscles immediately began to relax, the tension from the journey (and the ridiculous tutoring you had) melting away. You let out a quiet sigh of contentment, leaning back against the stone edge and letting the soothing heat seep into your skin. It was only then that you noticed Veritas’ gaze.

He was watching you intently, dark copper eyes trailing over the curves of your form as the water lapped gently around you. His expression was subtle but unmistakable—his lips curved in a small, appreciative smile, and there was a glimmer of something deeper in his eyes.

“Enjoying the view?” you teased, arching an eyebrow at him.

His eyes met yours, as if he were a deer caught in headlights, his ears turning a light shade of pink as he looked away.

“Always,” he replied, his voice low and smooth.

“But don’t let me distract you from relaxing... you’ve earned it.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, he wasn’t looking at you but you knew he could feel it.

“Oh, you bet I have.”

Casual conversation continued, drifting from shared jokes about the eccentricities of your trip to softer, more personal topics. Veritas’ voice was calm and steady, yet it carried a subtle warmth that made every word feel closer, more intimate. You found yourself mirroring his energy, your responses playful but tinged with sincerity.

With each passing minute, the distance between you seemed to vanish without either of you truly noticing—or maybe, neither of you wanted to admit you had. After a playful round of splashing water back and forth, the mood shifted. In a sudden, fluid motion, you found yourself in his lap with his palms holding your waist in a possessive grip.

“Comfortable?” he asked, his tone light but his gaze intense, the flicker of a teasing smile playing on his lips.

“Very,” you replied with a smile of your own, feeling emboldened. “Why? Are you nervous?”

His laugh was soft, almost too casual. “Not at all. Just making sure you’re not planning any sneak attacks.”

“Oh, please,” you scoffed, but you couldn’t help the way your smile lingered. At one point, you tilted your head back to laugh at something he said and he grabbed it as an opportunity to lay a kiss on the column of your throat.

“You know,” You began, flashing Veritas a charming smirk as an idea formed in your brain. Under the water, you placed your hands atop the ones already resting at your waist, pushing them lower and lower to the band of your underwear. Veritas’ eyes widened slightly in response as his eyes darted down to the water and back up to your eyes. His thumb twitched against your side, as if he was almost itching to peel off your clothes.

“You said that I should be grateful for this trip, right?”His eyes narrowed at your question, softly applying more pressure onto your hips as you shuddered.

“Not today,” Before you could blink, your body was met with the cold yet smooth surface of the stone behind you, Veritas had turned the two of you around and lifted you onto the rock so that only your calves stayed inside the water. The water sloshed around your heated bodies at the sudden motion, splashing your knees and his torso.

“Veritas!” Your reaction was instant, hands frantically gripping strong shoulders with goosebump-ridden arms. The man in question simply hooked his thumb under the band and teasingly rubbed circles on the wet skin as he observed your reactions.

“This trip is about you,” Veritas spoke in a hushed tone as he tugged lightly. Your ears burned in embarrassment as your swimsuit clung to your wet body. From this angle, you had to look down slightly to look into Veritas’ eyes, his face dusted with shades of red and you weren’t able to tell if he was blushing or if it was the heat from the hot spring. Another tug at your underwear had you snapping your legs shut in even more embarrassment.

“Veritas! Over here? Are you out of your mind?” Your voice is hushed as you frantically look around as if people were inside your very private room.

“Yes and no,” Another tug at your strap, “May I?”

Well, to be fair you had the room booked for another hour or so if you remember correctly. The door was also locked because you were the last one to enter and you didn’t want someone accidentally walking in while you were half naked and with your boyfriend. After weighing your options, you nodded your head shyly as you caved in to his request. “You are so lucky I love you.”

Veritas only smiled at you, finally tugging your underwear down to the middle of your thighs and slowly off the length of your legs, throwing it off to the side on the rocks as he knocked your knees apart with a firm, warm hand. He was in-between your legs before you could react, kissing you like a starved man. His left hand curled around the back of your waist as the right cupped your cheek to angle you downwards.

You gasped as his tongue swiped across the seam of your lips, the hand cupping your cheek slowly travelling down your torso. He stopped at the base of your chest, giving a gentle squeeze and a swipe over your nipple with his thumb and then moving lower until he reached your pussy. You shook as you felt a thick finger slide down from your clit to breach your entrance, pushing it in till it reached his knuckle before making shallow thrusts with it. You moaned softly at the sensation and Veritas took the opportunity to kiss you even more deeply.

Fuck.

All at once, his lips and his finger left you. A whine built at the back of your throat at the sudden loss of heat as you glared at Veritas.

“Oh, don’t give me that look.”

The doctor was back before you could voice your complaints, bending lower and hoisting your legs onto his corded shoulders. Veritas got to work immediately, like he had been waiting for an opportunity to present itself. His hands settled underneath the back of your thighs and his thumbs spread your lips open. He licked a long stripe upwards, dipping his tongue lightly inside you before bringing it up to your clit. Loud sounds of slurping filled the steam-filled room as your boyfriend lapped around your vulva. A loud moan was ripped from your throat as Veritas captured the nub of your clit into his mouth and sucked it gently. You grasped his hair at that, pushing his sweaty bangs back as the two of you made eye contact, you smirked, whispering as you spoke, “So, this is how you get the great Veritas, hah, Ratio to shut up, huh?”

Veritas took his mouth off your clit with a loud pop, licking his lips like he had a delectable meal as he challenged you right back, “Only for you.”

You could only gasp in surprise as he went right back to eating you out, some strands from his slicked back hair falling in front of his face as he gently bit down before kissing your clit, flicking the sensitive flesh with the tip of his tongue. Your orgasm was quick in approaching, you held onto his hair as you pushed your lower half into his face to ride it, the bridge of his nose bumping your clit as he moved lower to prod your entrance with his tongue.

“Veritas— I’m co—”

Your head fell back as you orgasmed, the prickling sensations rushing through your body as sweat rolled down your chest and forehead. The stones were cold, the water was hot and the room was heated which you realised, made for a wonderful sensory overload combined with Veritas’ ministrations. You rode out your orgasm as you ground your pussy on his face, tugging at purple strands as he swallowed everything you released.

Veritas finally let up when you released the grip on his hair, coming up from in-between your legs to gather your cum on his fingers, swiping it over his tongue as he swallowed all while making eye contact with you.

You were the first to speak, staring at his disheveled appearance as you spoke, “Holy shit.”

Veritas narrowed his eyes at you as he frowned. “Language.”

“Oh, don’t give me that after what you just did!”

Veritas moved his leg uncomfortably at that and you glanced down to note his half-hard dick in his trunks. Your gaze moved upwards as you caught your boyfriend blushing again. “Need help with that?” Your voice was a low, sultry purr as you moved to stand up but Veritas’ hands were on you in an instant, pushing you to sit back down.

“Not today. Let me take care of you.” Veritas sounded almost exasperated at your insistence so far.

“You already have! I doubt I can go again, Let me—”

“No. It’ll go away naturally. I want us to relax and enjoy this.” Veritas frowned at you this time and you knew you had lost. There was nothing harder than trying to talk to a stubborn scholar. Especially if it's your stubborn scholar.

“Fine, If you insist.”

Veritas chuckled softly at your reaction, turning to retrieve the herbal, non-toxic soaps neatly arranged on a wooden tray at the edge of the hot spring. With an easy grace, he returned, his movements steady and sure. Without a word, he leaned down and effortlessly scooped you up from where you were sitting on the rocks, cradling you as if you weighed nothing. His touch was firm but gentle as he carried you back into the warm embrace of the water, his lips curving into a soft smile as he watched you get settled back you down. You sighed as your cold body heated up once more, the now stiff muscles of your lower back unwinding and relaxing.

Veritas used the small pail left by the staff to take some water from the spring and gently rinse your hair. Then, he carefully poured a small amount of shampoo into his palm, the subtle aroma of lavender and eucalyptus filling the air as the steam enhanced the soothing scent. His fingers worked the shampoo into a rich lather, and he gestured for you to tilt your head back slightly. You complied, closing your eyes as the warm water swirled around you both.

His hands moved with a surprising tenderness, running through your hair in deliberate, gentle strokes. His fingertips brushed against your scalp with just the right amount of pressure, sending a wave of relaxation through your body. He took his time, working the shampoo into every strand, his touch both meticulous and unhurried.

“Looks like the hair oil I gave you has been working.” he murmured, his voice low and teasing and you could hear the faintest smile in his voice, even without opening your eyes.

“Only because someone insists on a strict self-care regime,” you replied with a quiet laugh, though you couldn’t deny how soothing his touch felt.

As he moved to massage your scalp, his thumbs pressed lightly against the base of your head, kneading away the tension you hadn’t even realized was there. His fingers traced slow, circular motions, and you couldn’t help but let out a contented sigh, the combination of the warm water and his careful attention melting away any lingering stress.

The intimacy of the moment wasn’t lost on either of you. His actions felt deliberate, as if he was pouring an unspoken affection into every gentle stroke and touch. When he finally rinsed your hair, cupping the water with his hands to ensure it didn’t get into your eyes, you opened them briefly to catch his expression.

His gaze was focused, softened by something unspoken, and when he caught you looking, he smiled. “Relax,” he said quietly, his voice carrying both a command and a reassurance. And after a long, long time, you let yourself do just that.

[theresattrpgforthat]

How to Find Cool Games: Newsletters

Plenty of game designers and other folks in the ttrpg space are using newsletters to keep people updated on their work. Newsletters are a great way to talk about what’s fascinating to you, give people snapshots of the things you’re working on, and offer links to freebies or extras for folks who are interested in your work. They also remind folks that you’re out there, making cool things.

I follow a number of different newsletters, and they offer different formats depending on their focus and the platform they use. But here’s what you can generally expect from a newsletter:

Updates on a designer’s work. Designers and small publishers will release updates on what they’re working on, including snapshots of works in progress, updates on crowdfunding initiatives, and pieces of art they may have recently finished or received.

Musings on aspects of design and play. Some game designers and prominent bloggers may release newsletters simply to talk about pieces of games that they’re excited about or ruminating on; how specific mechanics elicited special moments at the table, emotions or themes they’re hoping to invoke in their game projects, or perhaps talking about elements of a game book that make it interesting or enjoyable to read.

Reviews. This might be after playing a game or simply reading it, but interacting with other people’s games isn’t just a fun activity, it often also sparks thoughts about what the author values or doesn’t value in play. These reviews might include a brief overview of a game’s rules, highlight special moments in play, or cover more practical issues, such as the safety tools on offer, or the way the game layout affects their reading experience.

-Talking about the gaming hobby in general. This might include various perspectives in the hobby, like how colonialism affects steampunk games, or common experiences people of colour might have in a gaming space. It might also include safety practices and why the author finds certain practises helpful or unhelpful. There might also be ruminations on the business of game design, such as how to learn layout, how to network with artists, and advice on how to deal with the crowdfunding process.

So, with that in mind, let’s talk about some various newsletters that I’m subscribed to, and what I’ve gotten from them!

The Indie RPG Newsletter. @indierpgnewsletter

The Indie RPG Newsletter is the current project under the pen of Thomas Manuel, who’s also the host of the Yes Indie’d Podcast, as well as a writer for Rascal News (which we’ll get back to later). Thomas uses this as a place to talk about what’s getting him excited in the indie scene, as well as provide links to other people talking about cool game things; every newsletter has a section called Links of the Week . This section points you to some fun conversations happening in various ttrpg spaces. I think The Indie RPG Newsletter is a great jumping off point if you want to see what else is going on in a number of different spheres, and Thomas also has some really lovely insights into various mechanics that he’s interacting with as he tries out a slew of games at his table.

Rascal News.

The newsletter for Rascal News isn’t really a standalone thing - it’s an arm of the website of the same name, an independent team of journalists focused on news related to the world of TTRPGs.You need to create a free membership with the website in order to get these newsletters, but it’s a nice little window into not just the hottest news off of the press - various newsletters also carry links to their Announcements section, which is for the most part free to read, and contains a lot of updates about new and exciting ttrpg projects - including crowdfunding campaigns, podcast announcements, awards ceremonies, and special sales or bundles on offer. Currently the Rascal Team consists of Rowan Zeoli, Chase Carter, Caelyn Ellis - and, as previously mentioned, Thomas Manuel!

More Seats at the Table

More Seats a the Table is an email newsletter dedicated to highlighting games made by game designers of marginalized genders. It includes not just roleplaying games, but occasionally board-games as well, and each issue contains links to current crowdfunding initiatives, as well as advertisements that have been submitted to the newsletter through their submission form. This newsletter is straightforward and to-the-point, showing you a few games with quick blurbs - no more, no less. If you want news about games without a lot of fluff, you might be interested in More Seats at the Table.

Indie Press Revolution. @indiepressrevolution

Indie Press Revolution calls themselves a “network of quality creator-publishers”, and works to make people’s games available both through their online website and at various conventions. They also partner with retailers in acting as a distributor, bringing indie ttrpgs closer to your hometown! However, IPR also has its’ own newsletter, the IPR Revolutionary, which includes featured products, news related to various tabletop events, pricing updates, pdf updates, new stores added to the network, and links to oodles and oodles of crowdfunding projects. If you want to know what you can get in on right now, this monthly list of projects is a great collection.

5. Individual Designers: a short list.

If you’re a big OSR fan, you might find something in the Questing Beast newsletter, which is fairly regular and includes links to sales, reviews, and ads for games from various sponsors.

The Jar of Eyes Game Gazette has some really really good advice for game designers in their archive. I haven’t seen a lot of recent updates, but if the author starts sending out letters again, I think my eyes will be glued to the page.

Watt, the designer of Cloud Empress, has a regular Cloud Empress Newsletter that’s mostly focused around Watt’s work - but in the tradition of various popular OSR games, the exciting thing about these kinds of games is that there’s consistently new stuff. Watt includes little freebies in each newsletter, from roll tables, to small expansions, and little pieces of art. On top of that, Watt is quite happy to showcase work by other designers, especially projects that they have small parts in, as well as highlighting things that are currently giving them inspiration, such as movies, video games - and tabletop roleplaying games.

Asked Questions by Hendrik ten Napel, dives into specific games and game experiences that are making the author reflect on how the games direct his play. Some of his recent letters include an examination of Under Hollow Hills, how to create dramatic triangles between characters, and a loving review of Old Morris Cave, written by Tim Hutchings.

Dinoberry Press, a collaboration between Nevyn Holmes and Julie-Anne Muńoz, has a newsletter that gives you updates on what the designers are up to, how their games are coming along, and highlights projects that they’re excited about. Yes, it’s a form of marketing, but marketing is how you get info about new games! I followed them specifically because I am interested in their latest game, Little Wolves. You can sign up for their newsletter at the bottom of their website.

You’ve probably heard of Dave Thaumvore if you’re looking at ttrpg content on Youtube, and his attached newsletter has various subscription tiers - but I just subscribe to the free one. He does publish some content related to D&D, but he also sits down for interviews with designers; you’re likely to find high-end games from bigger companies being featured here. The most recent newsletter features a review with the designer of the upcoming game Flux Fantasy.

Christian Sorrell’s Missives of the Meatcastle is a little infrequent, but his updates are professional, thoughtful, and full of goodies. He includes little freebies for subscribers, alongside updates about his own work - both his passion projects and the projects of others that he writes for. His most recent update, titled "In Defense of Fiction", was a really insightful look into the ways prose can make a game more readable, and therefore more enjoyable to anyone reading a game book.

Cloven Pine Games has a newsletter that is fairly infrequent, but occasionally sends out updates on things that they have a hand in making, as well as news about game-adjacent events that they are involved in - such as awards shows, or game conventions. Their latest issue takes about Root and The Between, which are two projects that they had a hand in designing.

CJ Tucker has a newsletter for @crackerjackalopegames, which includes a regular roundup of “Things I Liked This Month”, as well as various musings about the connections they’re making across games and various media. Some of their newsletters that stand out to me include a review of NASA’s TTRPG adventure, using Breath of the Wild as inspiration for world building, and the concept of a house as a character (which led to the design of their game, ABODE.)

Tim Hutchings Makes Games is a newsletter by the author of Thousand Year Old Vampire, a solo game about a vampire who has lived so long that they can’t hold on to all of their memories. His newsletters consist of updates on things he’s working on, and events that he’s participating in. I think these kinds of newsletters can be great for other designers to follow, because it’s kind of a sneak peek into all of the various ways you can get involved in the scene, as well as provide snapshots of the kinds of considerations you might need to make as you try to promote your game. You can sign up for the newsletter at the bottom of the website.

Also...

A number of ttrpg creators also have free Patreon tiers which come with newsletters, including Possum Creek Games, Goblincow (@goblincow), and Penflower Ink. Not all of these posts will be public, but the ones that are will get sent to your email. (And of course, if you pay into their Patreons, you get all the posts.)

Honorable Mentions

9th Level Games

The Twenty Sided Newsletter, a partner newsletter for My First Dungeon.

Monte Cooke Games

[dashka12]

An Iron Blood Tale: Iron and Gold

An Iron Blood Tale: Iron and Gold by @experi-sketches

My second bind for (Fan) Fic Writer Appreciation Day.

This fic is ridiculously good and my favorite story that i found last year.

The whole inspiration for this book was inspired by one particular scene from the fic.

For the custom endpapers, i foiled on the tagline(theme?) of the fic, onto some art that matched the overall design elements.

I had a lot of fun working on the typeset for this - though it took me way to long to sit down and complete. I had a pretty clear vision for it, until i completely did a 180 and changed my mind lol. Which I'm glad i did as this typeset came out so well.

The story title pages and map - I LOVE when books have maps in the beginning so i was super excited to format the map.

Each chapter had a title, but I decided to keep the chapter images the same and to go with the cover design.

Threads, connectivity, and intertwining play a big role in this fic and I tried to incorporate the idea as much as possible.

I'm very happy with how this book turned out, especially the htv layering. Quite surprised on how smoothly it went on the first time tbh.

This bind was done as part of @renegadeguild Renegade Loves Fic(Writers), as a way to show appreciation to all the fic writers out there that share your amazing stories with us, by sending out a copy to them.

Thank you @experi-sketches for this lovely fic <3

HAPPY (FAN) FIC WRITERS APPRECIATION DAY

[suzannahnatters]

ANNOUNCING...the WEREWOLF OF WHITECHAPEL Special Edition Hardcover!

At last, by popular demand, The Werewolf of Whitechapel is getting a Special Edition Hardcover! Next month I'm running a Kickstarter campaign to help fund this project, which will be available in ebook and paperback as well as hardcover.

What is Kickstarter? It's a platform that allows you to essentially pre-order special books like these, and the author gets the funds released to them early so that they can use the money to create all the gorgeous features they wouldn't be able to include otherwise.

The Werewolf of Whitechapel Special Edition will come complete with gorgeous new cover design, new interior formatting, a wonderful frontispiece illustration by @scarvenartist herself, and more. I also have a number of exciting stretch goals planned if the campaign does well - including illustrated chapter headings, chatty Victorian-style chapter titles, and more!

To see the gorgeous new cover in all its glory, head over to Kickstarter and follow the project so that you can be notified once it goes live in mid-April!

[kirkscarr]

ok so i just finished my book cover for First, Best Destiny - Part 1 by the amazing @ophelia-j !!

admittedly i was going to wait until i actually attached the text block to the cover before i posted this haha, but i was SO excited after making this cover that i decided to just post it and then update with the finished product later!!

this book is absolutely embedded in my soul, and words cannot even describe how gorgeously it’s written. it’s a book that made me realize - hey, the adventure doesn’t end as you grow old.

you can read it here. i promise you won’t regret it!!!

anyways!!! here’s all of my other bookbinding steps for anyone interested.

cam’s somewhat incomplete bookbinding guide

please note that i am an AMATEUR hobbyist. please do not actually use this as a tutorial.

oh also!! bookbinding terminology will have a * by it which will be explained at the end in order to make this flow better. i’ll also link the tutorials i used at the end of this for anyone interested.

1) Formatting the document! I downloaded the original text as a PDF, and then designed a cover page, grabbed some art from the internet (i know, frowned upon, but this is just a personal copy so it is what it is), and then designed a table of contents and chapter icons!!

*side note! i added which episodes each chapter follows to the table of contents (pictured below) as this book was written as an accompaniment to TOS and the movies.

2) Next, I printed out all NINE HUNDRED PAGES??? admittedly i could have done it in less if I’d used a bigger page size, but sending things out to be printed is expensive so we made do. after printing, i folded them into signatures*.

*there’s an additional note about the paper i used at the end

3) punching out holes in all the signatures! although not technically necessary, I honestly don’t think i would’ve been able to sew this behemoth without doing it.

4) sewing the pages into a real!! actual!! book!! this was the part i was most nervous about. i’ve NEVER attempted to sew anywhere near this large of a book before, so i tried out a new method of sewing in hopes of making it a bit more sturdy. we won’t know if it worked until this book endures some wear and tear, but i’m pretty optimistic!

5) next up is glueing the spine! this is where it really hit me that a lot of bookbinding is just…glueing shit together. later i also added cardstock to the spine in hopes of helping it adhere to the cover better, and a book headband* for decoration.

5) now we’re onto the book cover!! they only sell bookboard in minor bulk around here, so we’re not even gonna discuss how much bookboard i now own… anyways! i glued the faux leather onto the bookboard and then let that dry.

6) last up! off to the cricket! a huge thank you to my friend for letting me borrow her cricket AND supplies! anywho, this is where i designed my cover art. i then adhered the design to the cover. after this step, i realized i…definitely need some kind of sealant - so, if any more seasoned bookbinders have suggestions for this i am all ears!!

all in all, this was a super fun project, and a great way to kill some time while i recover from surgery! i absolutely plan to bind the sequel at some point, but that may be a…ways away. i’m a STEM major and school starts back up soon so…time will be in short supply lol!

To be continued...

Terminology

*signature: group of sheets folded in half, to be worked into the binding as a unit.

*book headband: just look up a picture if you’re curious because tumblr says i can't add any more pictures lol.

*about the paper!! i actually got it from a local specialty paper store, but if you want something similar i've heard amazon has some good bookbinding alternatives!

Tutorials

please PLEASE go check out Jess Less on youtube. she's phenomenal. here are her vids and what i used them for.

don't laugh!! i actually stole MOST of my techniques straight from this video.

i used this one to help me format the book correctly! although i still ended up with some goofs haha (see: any pages on the left side have the page number in the margin LMAO).

[pawborough]

March Check In

Hello, all! Hope you’re well! Thanks for your patience as we chug along.

Let’s get right into it.

UI Icons

We took a little more time on this update because a large focus this last month went to an effort at icons and style consistency, and we wanted to show you everything we’ve done. We’ve been working on filling out the entire catalogue with UI icons, and we’re basically done!

Though with this update, we’ve moved from pixels, and into an illustrative UI style. The pixel icons will still be available for forums and general decorative use, though the cat emojis got an update!

Art by Hydde.

We reason that this better matches the artistic tone of the rest of the game. We’ll be inputting these onto the UI of the Closed Beta server over the next few days for testers to try out.

Jackalope Fauna

A WIP sketch of a new fauna coming up! 

Art by Remmie.

Decor Sketches

In addition, we’ve been working on decor!

Art by Remmie.

Wardrobe "Sandbox" Functionality

And in addition to general development, we’ve begun work on the next huge functionality push we’ll be doing, which is the “wardrobe” section. 

Users will be able to create designs, save them, and share them with others! Or keep them private!

There will also be functionality to apply any design to a cat from their customize page using items that the User already has in their inventory. 

Development Check-In

We recently performed our first maintenance wipe, and we covered a lot of ground this month. Things are looking good! We did have an issue where updating would break other functionalities, so we’ve taken the time this week to upgrade our testing suite, and this should hopefully mitigate the annoyance. We’re getting a lot of good economic data and have our bearings on what to tweak and where to go next.

We also took the time to update our admin panel, and this should tighten the pipeline for uploading accessory files, mitigating beta trial and error with improperly formatted images. We’re excited to continue improving!

Provided we get a few pesky bugs down, our big goal next week will be to start on Processing functionality; the ability to turn large items into smaller items, and to dye accessories. And in tandem, work on Pelt and Guild issues!

Our weekly report will come soon, otherwise it’s business as usual. 

To Summarize: We shared new icons, a fauna preview, decor sketches, the Wardrobe functionality, and a brief development check-in. What to expect next month: Further asset renderings and development, business as usual while we continue updating Closed Beta

[tamayula-journal]

To round off my year as Tamayula, I've only made one book of my own HL fanfiction for myself! I've been writing character x you fanfiction for almost twenty years now, but this is the first time I've made a book (Doujinshi), so I'm very excited😍

I thought about simply titling it 'Short stories about the Slytherin Boys' or something but I decided to be a bit stylish with the title because I'm so happy with the way it turned out. I quoted and paid homage to the heroine's line from my favourite novel The Dandelion Girl: 'Day before yesterday I saw a rabbit, and yesterday a deer, and today, you.' (I've always thought this line one of the most romantic lines ever since I discovered it in Portal 2 😌) The title refers to the MC's circumstances, such as meeting the owl who carries her acceptance letter, entering the Wizarding World after almost being attacked by a dragon, and meeting Sebastian (or Ominis), the man of her destiny who would later become her partner for life… 🤣

It's a book for myself, so I haven't corrected any typos and I haven't formatted it, but I'm very happy with the finished book, which I did almost everything myself, including the cover illustration and the design! (I borrowed the R-18 symbol and the white frame on the back cover from a design distributed on the web) The year 2023 has been a really meaningful year for me, in which I have been able to try many things!

[aelinfireheartgalathynius]

I finally finished my four-volume ATYD layout!

The body text is larger than any formatted version I have found before, which is why it's four volumes instead of three. (The images I added to this post are just thumbnail previews, not meant to illustrate the relative size of the text.) I designed covers, front matter, chapter accents, and gave each character their own handwriting style for their letters!

I put a huge amount of work into this (for myself!) and I'm excited to share with anyone who is interested. The fanart and fonts I used are all credited (fanart in the front matter, fonts in the back) in case anyone wants to look them up.

These PDFs were specifically designed for printing as perfect-bound paperbacks, which is why the margins are larger on the sides toward the spine. There are all sorts of print-on-demand book sites out there that you can use to order your own copies. If you're handy with InDesign I can send you the .indd files if you'd like to modify them.

If anyone is super interested in having these in EPUB format (for e-readers), I can also share those versions, but they won't have the custom fonts because EPUB formats don't play well with those.

These are hosted on my Google Drive and I have no immediate plans to delete them, but I do recommend downloading them if you think you'll want them in the future, in case I need to delete them down the road.

Here are the files: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1t1ZKdmkDDDUAYqY3Lp6EUilchX5UErlQ?usp=sharing

Tags for those who requested them: @likehephaestionwhodied, @lady-stardust-incarnate, @mxed-salad-greens, @cherryberry1403

[film-in-my-soul]

There are 56 different Arcane offerings for the digital section of @fandomtrumpshate this year from 53 different creators.

Fan Art: 14

Fan Labor: 6

Podfic: 3

Written Fanwork: 29

Video: 1

If you're excited to donate to some amazing charities, check out these fantastic offerings below the cut and set your calendars for February 25th - March 1st!

[all 56 listings below the cut]

CopperyHeart | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s):Banner, Book cover, podfic cover, or other cover art, Drawing/painting/etc., Chibi Discord sticker/emoji Highest rating: E Minimum Bid: $5 Audience: All ages Length/scope: Each additional person is +10$. The minimum bid for a detailed background is 50$. Fanwork Details: You will receive a digital illustration of the character(s) of your choice. Characters/pairings of interest: I ship Piltover's Finest (CaitVi), JayVik and Ekko/Jinx(Powder). But I will also draw other characters or pairings.

deathbycoldopen - @deathbycoldopen | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Banner, Book cover, Comic, Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: $25 Audience: All ages Length/scope: Single page art piece, no/minimal background - $25 ; Single page art piece, detailed background $35 ; Two-page comic - $50 Characters/pairings of interest: Any characters, Jayce/Viktor, Mel/Jayce/Viktor, Ekko/AU!Powder, Ekko/Jinx

escyn - @escyn | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: E Minimum Bid: $15 Audience: 18+ only Length/scope: anything under $100 will be a sketch w/ flat colors and simple background, over $100 will be fully rendered, can have a complex background, and can be nsfw! Fanwork Details: 1 digital Illustration of up to 3 characters; delivered in png form at 300 dpi in printer friendly color formatting

Jules | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: $5 Audience: All ages Fanwork Details: Mid body up, semi-realistic “painted” portraits. No more than TWO (2) characters per canvas. Flat or simple background ONLY OR Full body stylized and cell shaded character. Flat or simple background ONLY No more than one (1) character per canvas HOWEVER- this can be a character sheet and include up to three (3) drawings of character on sheet. options as listed: full body front view, full body 3/4 view, upper body front view, upper body 3/4 view, upper body rear view) Characters/pairings of interest: Characters(PREFERRED): Vi, Sevika(!!!), Viktor, Jinx, Ekko(!!!) Ships (ONLY): caitvi, timebomb, Vander/Silco

Linecrosser - @linecrosser | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: $25 Audience: All ages Fanwork Details: Digital drawing, 2-3 characters, simple background, clean lineart, full colour

loom - @nommedeploom | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: E Minimum Bid: $5 Audience: 18+ only Fanwork Details: i am able to do a fully rendered illustration for the winning bid! Characters/pairings of interest: i am most interested in is zaundads (vander/silco) from arcane, but any ship (or gen work!) is welcome!

peupeukoo | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Moodboard Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: $6 Audience: All ages Fanwork Details: A 1:1 ration, high quality moodboard that combines individual graphics into one cohesive piece. The graphics will all be custom made by me with texts of your fic/song lyrics/quotes that you might want to add, along with pictures of your pairing(s) like a traditional moodboard! Characters/pairings of interest: I'd really love to work with Caitvi!

PopcornComet - @popcorncomet | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: $5 Audience: 18+ only Fanwork Details: A3 size digital art painting, with background. Can be a pencil design or fully rendered, whatever the bidder likes best Characters/pairings of interest: Jayvik is my bread and butter. Any form, any dynamic, up to and including Vikjay from OG League

Reyn | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: $10 Audience: All ages Fanwork Details:Digital art of one to two people, bust and above, with a solid color background. Characters/pairings of interest: Jinx/Ekko

seanchaidh7 - @seanchaidh7 | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: Sketch - $20-40, Basic coloured portrait - $45 -60, multiple characters - $65-100, Complex pieces $100+, over $200+ additional options available* - See pinned tumblr post for style references Fanwork Details: Digital Art - portraits Characters/pairings of interest: Jayce/Viktor, Caitlyn/Vi, Ekko/Jinx

sjonni33 - @sjonni33 | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Banner, Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: E Minimum Bid: $30 Audience: 18+ only Length/scope: 1 character halfbody (fully rendered) for 30, 1 character full body for 40 (fully rendered), 2 characters half body for 60 (fully rendered), 2 characters full body for 75 (fully rendered) Special interests (what is this?): Aro/ace characters, Canonically trans or nonbinary chars, F/F ships, Rarepairs, Trans or nonbinary interpretations of canon characters, Unhappy endings Fanwork Details: 1 to 2 characters, half to full body, fully rendered. Characters/pairings of interest: Jayce & Viktor, Jayce & Mel

thence-we-came-forth - @thence-we-came-forth | [Offer Page 1] [Offer Page 2]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: $10 Audience: 18+ only Length/scope: Style 1 Lineart head 10, half body 15, full body 20 Simple colour head 20, half body 30, full body 40 Full render head 30, half body 45, full body 60 Style 2 Messy portrait head 15 Simple Crosshatching head 15, half body 20, full body 30 Full Crosshatching head 20, half body 40, full body 50 Amounts include 1 character and a simple background, for additional characters, add 50% of base amount For examples you can check out my tumblr post here https://www.tumblr.com/thence-we-came-forth/773918576082141184/hello-this-is-a-post-for-this-years Characters/pairings of interest: Caitvi, Jayvik, Timebomb

valli_exe | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Comic, Drawing/painting/etc., Icon(s) Highest rating: M Minimum Bid: $5 Audience: All ages Fanwork Details: Digital art!!! For B&W line art= $5 for bust, $10 for half-body, and $15 for full body. For Flat Colour: $10 for bust, $15 for half-body, and $20 for full body. For Fully Rendered: $20 for bust, $25 for half-body, and $30 for full body. Additional characters are +50% of the price (e.g. flat colour bust is $10, additional character would be 50% of $10 which is $5 which will be added to the initial price resulting in $15 overall). Anything over $20 can get a background of the bidders choosing (not just a solid colour!!!) Characters/pairings of interest: I'm interested in drawing either CaitVi and Timebomb! I am also open to drawing combinations of Jayvik, Meljayvik, Meljay and Melvik. Again, I am willing to draw any other character from the show as well!

Zivilzz - @zivilzz | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Drawing/painting/etc. Highest rating: E Minimum Bid: $35 Audience: 18+ only Fanwork Details: Full rendered colored piece, with background, max 3 characters (Especially for smut) and whatever they can think off OR Concept art for Environment or Character Design. Characters/pairings of interest: Silco/Vander/Viktor/Jayce/Vi/Caitlyn

bluejayblueskies - @bluejayblueskies | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Typesetting Highest rating: E Minimum Bid: $5 Audience: 18+ only Length/scope: More than 50k words Characters/pairings of interest: Jayce/Viktor, Viktor, Jayce

cyankelpie - @cyan-kelpie | [Offer Page]

Subtype(s): Betaing Highest rating: T Minimum Bid: $5 Audience: All ages Length/scope: 10 - 20k words

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Subtype(s): Betaing, Sensitivity reading, Create/update Fanlore pages, stuff like that Highest rating: E Minimum Bid: $50 Audience: All ages Length/scope: For Betaing, about 20K max for intense betaing, but I might be willing to help with a longer fic. To create a fanlore page, probably less than 5k, not including quotes. Fanwork Details: Culture Picking: I'm an ace lesbian, if you need some feedback on writing either of those. Betaing: Depends on what you are comfortable with. At minimum I'm happy to edit grammar, but I'm also happy to be a soundboard during drafting, and to offer feedback about structure and other more rewrite-intensive critique, if you are up for that. Fanlore Pages: I'm happy to create a fanlore page on your choice of subject, or to overhaul an existing one. However, the less I know about the subject, the more I may need to rely on you for guidance and feedback. I.e. if you want me to create a page for one of your fics, you'd need to summarize the fic for me, or for a fandom I don't know, you'd have to point me towards the Big Things to know about the fandom and where I might get first-handed sources to read about it, etc.

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Subtype(s): fan fiction (new) Highest rating: E Minimum Bid: $5 Audience: 18+ only Length/scope: Less than 5k words Characters/pairings of interest: I'm willing to write Jayvik or Meljayvik.

mediums-georg - @mediums-georg | [Offer Page]

Type of fanwork: Video Highest rating: T Minimum Bid: $10 Audience: All ages Length/scope: $10 for each 15 seconds up to roughly 6 minutes Fanwork Details:Video edit Characters/pairings of interest: Vi/Caitlyn, Jayce/Viktor

[beepboopkek]

— Practice makes perfect (M!Reader) [Part Two]

Including: Dr.Ratio x M!Reader

Part one is here

F!Reader version has been posted on both ao3 and tumblr as well!

cw: ! NSFW ! , M!Reader, established relationship, b0tt0m!sub!reader x d0m!t0p!ratio , fluff and smut, soft dr ratio, he's called veritas, oral M recieving, light cursing, hot spring freaking, aftercare, lmk if I missed anything

w/c: 2.8k

a/n: the long awaited part two to the dr ratio fic!! probably not what you guys are expecting but i like myself some soft ratio content too so ... also i apologise sincerely for any formatting mistakes, I decided I would post tonight, fell sick, still decided to go to my pc and post it and then . my pc stopped responding . so now I'm on phone rip,, anyway I hope you enjoy!

NSFW BELOW THE CUT

After your impromptu romp together, you somehow managed to get all the questions right—but not without significant struggle. Every wrong answer had earned you a “punishment” that left your cheeks burning and your body aching in ways that were both mortifying and thrilling. The aftermath of your study session was a blur of sore muscles, a tender lower half, and your boyfriend’s sheepish but endearing attempts to make amends with a parade of apologetic gifts. Which eventually led the two of you to decide to escape the chaos of your work lives for a while, booking a short trip to the Xianzhou Luofu.

Reaching there was easy enough, with Veritas’ connection to the IPC, a shuttle was already booked and the hotel reservations were made well in advance. The hotel was nestled in a quiet corner of Aurum Alley, the Luofu’s vibrant culinary street bustling with tantalizing aromas and lively chatter. It was Veritas’ first choice for a good reason—the hotel was renowned for its luxurious indoor hot springs, a favorite among tourists visiting the Luofu for the first time. Veritas, ever the planner, seemed thoroughly content ensuring everything was perfectly set for your stay.

On the day of your arrival, you were promptly escorted to your rooms, where the welcoming scent of fresh herbs and subtle incense greeted you. The two of you wasted no time settling in, quickly changing into swimsuits to prepare for the highlight of the trip—an exclusive session at the indoor hot spring that Veritas had, unsurprisingly, pre-booked well in advance. The thought of sinking into the warm, sparkling waters after a long journey made you feel a little more relaxed already. As you adjusted the band of your swim trunks, you couldn’t help but notice Veritas’ smug smile, clearly proud of his meticulous planning.

As you stepped into the indoor hot spring area, the atmosphere immediately shifted to one of relaxation. The air was warm and thick with a gentle mist, carrying the soothing scent of eucalyptus and jasmine. The space was softly lit by lanterns with intricate designs, their golden glow reflecting off the rippling water below. The hot spring itself was a stunning centerpiece, its natural stone edges blending seamlessly with the room’s tranquil aesthetic. The water shimmered with a faint blue-green hue, its surface occasionally disturbed by the gentle flow from a carved stone spout. Surrounding the spring were polished wooden benches and plush white towels neatly folded, ready for use. You spotted a wooden tray with a different array of soaps placed on the stone, presumably for the people that enjoy bathing in the springs. The walls were adorned with elegant scrolls depicting scenes of the Luofu’s rich history. Overhead, bamboo slats covered the ceiling, allowing air to easily pass through the porous wood.

It was quiet, save for the soft trickle of water and the occasional hum of wind from vents designed to maintain the perfect balance of warmth and freshness. Veritas practically lit up as he stepped into the steamy room, his usual calm demeanor giving way to excitement. His sharp features, usually composed in a stoic expression, softened as his gaze darted to the shimmering surface of the hot spring. A smile spread across his face as his eyes met yours.

He shrugged off the towel draped over his shoulders, revealing the drool-worthy cords of muscle, well-defined shoulders flexing at the action. His movements were quick but unhurried, like someone who had been waiting for this moment and couldn’t hide his eagerness any longer.

He shot you a glance over his shoulder and without waiting for an answer, he stepped into the steaming water, his breath hitching slightly as the heat lapped at his skin. A contented sigh escaped his lips as he sank deeper and deeper until the water skimmed across the solid expanse of the middle of his torso, resting his back against the smooth stones of the spring.

“This,” he declared, his smile widening as he tilted his head back to enjoy the warmth, the tips of his violet curls getting soaked in the process, “was definitely worth the trip.” There was something infectious about his excitement—it was rare to see him so unguarded, and you couldn’t help but smile as he gestured for you to join him, splashing the water lightly in your direction.

You stepped cautiously to the edge of the hot spring making sure you didn't accidentally slip and make a fool of yourself, the warm mist curled around your skin as you adjusted your trunks one final time. The heat of the water brushed against your toes as you dipped them in, drawing a soft inhale from you. Slowly, you eased yourself into the spring, the silky warmth enveloping your body inch by inch.

As you sank into the water, your muscles immediately began to relax, the tension from the journey (and the ridiculous tutoring you had) melting away. You let out a quiet sigh of contentment, leaning back against the stone edge and letting the soothing heat seep into your skin. It was only then that you noticed Veritas’ gaze.

He was watching you intently, dark copper eyes trailing over your form as the water lapped gently around you. His expression was subtle but unmistakable—his lips curved in a small, appreciative smile, and there was a glimmer of something deeper in his eyes.

“Enjoying the view?” you teased, arching an eyebrow at him.

His eyes met yours, as if he were a deer caught in headlights, his ears turning a light shade of pink as he looked away.

“Always,” he replied, his voice low and smooth.

“But don’t let me distract you from relaxing... you’ve earned it.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, he wasn’t looking at you but you knew he could feel it.

“Oh, you bet I have.”

Casual conversation continued, drifting from shared jokes about the eccentricities of your trip to softer, more personal topics. Veritas’ voice was calm and steady, yet it carried a subtle warmth that made every word feel closer, more intimate. You found yourself mirroring his energy, your responses playful but tinged with sincerity.

With each passing minute, the distance between you seemed to vanish without either of you truly noticing—or maybe, neither of you wanted to admit you had. After a playful round of splashing water back and forth, the mood shifted. In a sudden, fluid motion, you found yourself in his lap with his palms holding your waist in a possessive grip.

“Comfortable?” he asked, his tone light but his gaze intense, the flicker of a teasing smile playing on his lips.

“Very,” you replied with a smile of your own, feeling emboldened. “Why? Are you nervous?”

His laugh was soft, almost too casual. “Not at all. Just making sure you’re not planning any sneak attacks.”

“Oh, please,” you scoffed, but you couldn’t help the way your smile lingered. At one point, you tilted your head back to laugh at something he said and he grabbed it as an opportunity to lay a kiss on the column of your throat.

“You know,” You began, flashing Veritas a charming smirk as an idea formed in your brain. Under the water, you placed your hands atop the ones already resting at your waist, pushing them lower and lower to the band of your swim trunks. Veritas’ eyes widened slightly in response as his eyes darted down to the water and back up to your eyes. His thumb twitched against your side, as if he was almost itching to peel off your clothes.

“You said that I should be grateful for this trip, right?” His eyes narrowed at your question, softly applying more pressure onto your hips as you shuddered.

“Not today,” Before you could blink, your body was met with the cold yet smooth surface of the stone behind you, Veritas had turned the two of you around and lifted you onto the rock so that only your calves stayed inside the water. The water sloshed around your heated bodies at the sudden motion, splashing your knees and his torso.

“Veritas!” Your reaction was instant, hands frantically gripping strong shoulders with goosebump-ridden arms. The man in question simply pushed the band lower and teasingly rubbed circles on the newly exposed wet skin as he observed your reactions.

“This trip is about you,” Veritas spoke in a hushed tone as he tugged lightly. Your ears burned in embarrassment as your swimsuit clung to your wet body. From this angle, you had to look down slightly to look into Veritas’ eyes, his face dusted with shades of red and you weren’t able to tell if he was blushing or if it was the heat from the hot spring. Another tug at your shorts had you snapping your legs shut in even more embarrassment.

“Veritas! Over here? Are you out of your mind?” Your voice is hushed as you frantically look around as if people were inside your very private room.

“Yes and no,” Another tug at your shorts, “May I?”

Well, to be fair you had the room booked for another hour or so if you remember correctly. The door was also locked because you were the last one to enter and you didn’t want someone accidentally walking in while you were half naked and with your boyfriend. After weighing your options, you nodded your head shyly as you caved in to his request. “You are so lucky I love you.”

Veritas only smiled at you, finally tugging your shorts down to the middle of your thighs and slowly off the length of your legs, throwing it off to the side on the rocks as he knocked your knees apart with a firm, warm hand. He was in-between your legs before you could react, kissing you like a starved man. His left hand curled around the back of your waist as the right cupped your cheek to angle you downwards.

You gasped as his tongue swiped across the seam of your lips, the hand cupping your cheek slowly travelling down your torso. He stopped as his palm made contact with your pert nipple, giving a gentle squeeze and a swipe over it with his thumb and then moving lower until he reached your cock. You shook as you felt thick fingers wrap around you, giving slow purposeful strokes. You moaned softly at the sensation and Veritas took the opportunity to kiss you even more deeply.

Fuck.

All at once, his lips and his hand left you. A whine built at the back of your throat at the sudden loss of heat as you glared at Veritas.

“Oh, don’t give me that look.”

The doctor was back before you could voice your complaints, bending lower and hoisting your legs onto his corded shoulders. Veritas got to work immediately, like he had been waiting for an opportunity to present itself. His hands curled around your thighs, keeping you spread open for him. He licked a long stripe upwards, dipping his tongue lightly inside the hole of your tip before bringing it back down to the base. Loud sounds of slurping filled the steam-filled room as your boyfriend took the head of your cock in his mouth. A loud moan was ripped from your throat as Veritas took you deeper into his mouth and sucked gently. You grasped his hair at that, pushing his sweaty bangs back as the two of you made eye contact, you smirked, whispering as you spoke, “So, this is how you get the great Veritas, hah, Ratio to shut up, huh?”

Veritas took his mouth off you with a loud pop, licking his lips like he had a delectable meal as he challenged you right back, “Only for you.”

You could only gasp in surprise as he went right back to blowing you, some strands from his slicked back hair falling in front of his face as he pulled back again to lay a kiss on the tip, flicking the sensitive flesh with the tip of his tongue. Your orgasm was quick in approaching, you held onto his hair as you pushed his face down.

“Veritas— I’m co—”

Your head fell back as you orgasmed, the prickling sensations rushing through your body as sweat rolled down your chest and forehead. The stones were cold, the water was hot and the room was heated which you realised, made for a wonderful sensory overload combined with Veritas’ ministrations. You rode out your orgasm as you held Veritas in position, fucking his face while tugging at purple strands as he swallowed everything you released.

Veritas finally let up when you released the grip on his hair, coming up from in-between your legs to gather some of the escaped cum on his fingers, swiping it over his tongue as he swallowed all while making eye contact with you.

You were the first to speak, staring at his disheveled appearance as you spoke, “Holy shit.”

Veritas narrowed his eyes at you as he frowned. “Language.”

“Oh, don’t give me that after what you just did!”

Veritas moved his leg uncomfortably at that and you glanced down to note his half-hard dick in his trunks. Your gaze moved upwards as you caught your boyfriend blushing again. “Need help with that?” Your voice was a low, sultry purr as you moved to stand up but Veritas’ hands were on you in an instant, pushing you to sit back down.

“Not today. Let me take care of you.” Veritas sounded almost exasperated at your insistence so far.

“You already have! I doubt I can go again, Let me—”

“No. It’ll go away naturally. I want us to relax and enjoy this.” Veritas frowned at you this time and you knew you had lost. There was nothing harder than trying to talk to a stubborn scholar. Especially if it's your stubborn scholar.

“Fine, If you insist.”

Veritas chuckled softly at your reaction, turning to retrieve the herbal, non-toxic soaps neatly arranged on a wooden tray at the edge of the hot spring. With an easy grace, he returned, his movements steady and sure. Without a word, he leaned down and effortlessly scooped you up from where you were sitting on the rocks, cradling you as if you weighed nothing. His touch was firm but gentle as he carried you back into the warm embrace of the water, his lips curving into a soft smile as he watched you get settled back you down. You sighed as your cold body heated up once more, the now stiff muscles of your lower back unwinding and relaxing.

Veritas used the small pail left by the staff to take some water from the spring and gently rinse your hair. Then, he carefully poured a small amount of shampoo into his palm, the subtle aroma of lavender and eucalyptus filling the air as the steam enhanced the soothing scent. His fingers worked the shampoo into a rich lather, and he gestured for you to tilt your head back slightly. You complied, closing your eyes as the warm water swirled around you both.

His hands moved with a surprising tenderness, running through your hair in deliberate, gentle strokes. His fingertips brushed against your scalp with just the right amount of pressure, sending a wave of relaxation through your body. He took his time, working the shampoo into every strand, his touch both meticulous and unhurried.

“Looks like the hair oil I gave you has been working.” he murmured, his voice low and teasing and you could hear the faintest smile in his voice, even without opening your eyes.

“Only because someone insists on a strict self-care regime,” you replied with a quiet laugh, though you couldn’t deny how soothing his touch felt.

As he moved to massage your scalp, his thumbs pressed lightly against the base of your head, kneading away the tension you hadn’t even realized was there. His fingers traced slow, circular motions, and you couldn’t help but let out a contented sigh, the combination of the warm water and his careful attention melting away any lingering stress.

The intimacy of the moment wasn’t lost on either of you. His actions felt deliberate, as if he was pouring an unspoken affection into every gentle stroke and touch. When he finally rinsed your hair, cupping the water with his hands to ensure it didn’t get into your eyes, you opened them briefly to catch his expression.

His gaze was focused, softened by something unspoken, and when he caught you looking, he smiled. “Relax,” he said quietly, his voice carrying both a command and a reassurance. And after a long, long time, you let yourself do just that.

[taylor-titmouse]

Shrinking Violet is out! another of @petitemortality R/L Monroe's wonderful erotic shorts, with another cover by yours truly >:) i've been saying it on nearly every promo post i make for this but if you're one of the people who has wanted me to write f/f, you're legally obligated to read this one. below is the sales copy, and then below that some discussion of the process for designing the cover!

Nobody at college knows that shy, nervous Maya had a 'bad boy' reputation in high school - and Maya is the only one who knows tough, rebellious Nasrin used to be a sweet-tempered teacher's pet. Mutual attraction is rekindled when their paths cross again, but the two find their old dynamics have been flipped on their head. Maya finally knows what she wants, and Nasrin is bold enough to give it to her...that is, if she can bring herself to ask. Will their first time be perfect the second time around? 7k words, EPUB and PDF format. This is the second in the Fuck Yourself Friday series of shorts. New stand-alone erotic stories are released on the last Friday of every month. FYF 1: Go Fuck Yourself These stories contain explicit sexual content, and are intended for 18+ audiences.

Contains: -F/tF -transfem sub -outdoor sex -praise kink -soft penis stimulation -non-penetrative sex

THUMBNAILS

this one was very straightforward with the request: "the image I have in my mind for a cover is someone's fingers knotted in a skirt spread out against wildflowers. but more in the sort of gripping your own skirt gently kind of way, somewhere between anxious and excited if that makes sense. I'm thinking like you know the classic soft grunge tumblr aesthetic photo vibe. type of shit you'd post next to a closeup of a skinned knee in long socks"

very easy instructions to follow! so while i usually prefer to do 3 thumbnails, i only ended up with 2. there's only so many ways you can depict a hand on a skirt, after all. and we decided that we wanted to continue with the style i established with the first one, with silhouettes, lineless art, and bold textures. we liked the first one more, but wanted to get some leg in there.

i proposed adding black pantyhose to the narrative to make it work on the cover (i have changed prose to match what i drew for illustrations Many times) but we went with bare leg in the end

FINISHING

so i didn't actually do a sketch for this one, just went straight to rendering. as we all know i use gradient maps a lot in my work, so i gave lee a choice between a bright, springy palette, and a wetter, darker palette. i also offered it with the border, or with the skirt going over it. personally i like the skirt going over it, but the border keeps it consistent and more book-cover-y, so we went with that. lee chose the darker palette, which suits the story much better

but the font didn't fit! too vintage for the story, which takes place in modern day.

fonts time :^)

we went with the third option for the contrast. and also added a raindrop to the flower (which got moved to the right petal in the final draft). gently touching petals, wetness, This Is Yuri.

and the final result is as above!

anyway you should all read this story, it's incredibly sweet childhood-best-friends-to-lovers and in itself a love letter to trans femininity. i highly recommend it, and it's only $3!

go and get it!

[franticruby]

I’m not sure if you’re still in pokespe but i am horribly curious what magma!ruby’s lore is if you want to share anything!!! I absolutely love his design it’s soo good <3

hihi so sorry for the late response! and thank you SO MUCH i’m so happy you like my design!! i had to genuinely think about how to format this because this ask sent me on a month long ruby renaissance (he never left i just got real into some old interests for a couple weeks) and trying to think of a short winded way to explain my au because the original explanation i wrote was literal pages long 😭🙏 OFFICIAL MAGMA RUBY LORE! THANK YOU FOR ASKING THIS QUESTION MADE ME SO HAPPY

Magma Admin!Ruby, also known as Magma Ruby and Fourth Flame Ruby, is my take on the AU that I started working on a little over 3 years ago where Courtney began researching Ruby a lot earlier and thus scouting him for team magma. A lot of the au focuses on some hypotheticals i find interesting and some dynamics i really wanted to happen so really it’s just very self indulgent lol ^^

in this ruby never took the running shoes norman gave him and because of this he never ran off that cliff and never met sapphire/started the bet, instead being chased into a bush where he was helped by courtney. they get along pretty well, ruby likes that she doesn’t ask questions, and it’s just nice to have someone out there who believes in his contest career. she offers to let him crash at her place but he’s adamant that he can stay at hotels for now until that money starts to dwindle. courtney introduces him to tabitha, soft launches the idea of team magma, that seeds planted in his head, and then ruby’s flat broke. the contests aren’t covering all his expenses, he barely knows how to camp, and he’s conveniently got these two friends who’re willing to let him stay at their place. and what is that place? abandoned house.

what courtney failed to mention is that their pseudo-cult does NOT have stable housing but she assures him that it’s not that bad and brings him in to speak with maxie, who he actually gets along pretty well with. it’s clear that these guys are well established, loyal, and committed. he doesn’t really agree with what they’re doing but it’s better than being on the streets and potentially found by his dad. and so now he’s staying with team magma and all he’s required to do is help out a little bit with the stuff they’re doing, at first just some research, preparing food, even making some outfits which he’s excited to do, and in return he gets a room, meals, and… a FATHER FIGURE!?!?!

he gets emotionally attached to maxie. he’s a weak weak boy and very lacking in that department and now he just really cares about making him proud. now his responsibilities are piling up a bit and he can’t really travel a ton to participate in new contests, sort of at the whim of when they have to move bases, but they do so frequently enough that he’s still content. now he’s coming along on missions and doing some support work, still not battling, but then they’re on their way to steal the submarine when who do they come across? SAPPHIRE!! AND SHES KICKING THEIR ASSES!!!!!

most of the grunts are down so it’s really just tabitha and ruby, who’s helping out pretty minimally, mostly being lookout, but sapphire recognises him as a weak link and immediately attacks. ruby panics because this very strong, fanged, leaf wrapped girl is now tackling him to the ground and he doesn’t really want to fight her in front of all his coworkers so he ends up running away and leaving tabitha by himself. everyone’s pretty pissed at him for that because it cost them the submarine so courtney sits him down and opens up a little bit about her backstory and why she fights and how beautiful she finds burning things. this resonates with a ruby a bit and he starts to consider fighting again when necessary, at least to help team magma.

This au is stretched out along a longer timeline than canon, and when ruby meets blaise they are very annoyed with each other and begin a rivalry in which either one tries to become an admin before the other. over the months ruby climbs the ranks and becomes more ruthless and desperate to please maxie, not knowing that all the admins basically know everything about him and who his father is. after a successful mission, he’s finally promoted to admin, basically only so that he feels more indebted to stay with team magma and not because he really deserves it, BUT!! because of this he gets a little promotion gift.

tabitha is a bit of a blend between his rs and oras designs/traits and is a little more chill— but because of this he’s very technologically savvy and makes gauntlets and boots for ruby. all of the admins (also blaise but not yet) have their own little gimmicks, like his smoke putting people to sleep, blaise’s illusions, and courtney’s berries (also burning things to crisps but i see that more as her rejecting gimmicks) and ruby’s is vortexes of fire that are used to propel himself in the air. these are meant to parallel the running shoes ^^ courtney also gives him a solrock that’s his fire type

—

i’m gonna take the promotion as a chance to explain sapph just a bit because i love her so much. i have more but this’ll be too long if i use it but basically i used this au as a chance to explore some themes i really like and wish were used with her story ^^

sapph, of course, doesnt meet ruby at the start of the arc, but birch does task her with being on the lookout while she’s on her journey. She’s just a little more messed up by the salamence incident and has more of a complex about strength and this’ll affect her a lot later on.

she ends up meeting wally in petalburg because she was sent to speak with norman a bit and helps him catch a pokemon, not lending him her own pokemon but encouraging him to be more active in the battle himself and kind of legends arceus-ing (i’ve never played it dont quote me on that but like. he didn’t fight the pokemon with his bare hands but he distracted it yknow lol) but then the earthquake happens and wallys washed away!!! and so she goes on her journey mostly as normal, helping mr stone and being given the letter, and then she’s approached about a capture of the museum because of some coverage she’s gotten under gabby and ty (i love them i need them somewhere) and goes to help out.

they’re not too hard to deal with but there’s this kid her age who’s doing an insane job picking apart her team but wont fight back when she comes after him? and she kind of tucks that away in her mind for later, but successfully chases them away and is approached by winona, who wants her to train under her gym and sapphire’s very excited about this! this guidance is really what she needs because she’s not really getting that competitive push, and she’s knocking out badges until the threat of team magma and aqua begin to be a little too real.

Since the story is drawn out a bit more unfortunately i do not know how to use the bet’s significance yet but basically it’s just like in canon where she abandons it for a bit because of everything going on😭 during this weird period she’s mostly jsut camping out and training and plotting and all that.

wally was found by mr briney and goes through a lot of ruby’s plot points until he returns to the mainland where his parents are of course a little very worried about him and bring him to verdanturf to recover, but he’s still doing his own training when he can. sapph is mostly hanging out between mauville and fortree and she’s still very close with and helping wally out while coordinating w gym leaders, but while she’s doing that who shows up to her campsite in the middle of the night? MAGMA ADMIN RUBY!?!?!!??

this parts confusing but basically ruby isn’t the strongest admin but he’s borderline maxie’s right hand man and assistant, and by this point since ruby’s joined team aqua and magma have been looking for the orbs for about a year.

it’s now june and they’re at a stalemate, so ruby’s been sent to negotiate with matt and shelly. the two of them want to speed things up and while aqua has the technology to locate the orbs, it’d be a lot faster if tabitha and shelly were to work together again, and so they temporarily team up to find both orbs faster.

eventually the locator is finished and there’s a mad dash to get the orbs, which are claimed by team magma!!! they celebrate and this is a huge moment for them all, but now suddenly this overarching goal that ruby doesnt really believe in is becoming a little too real, and he never imagined itd go this far. This is when team magma throws a party, drinking and eating for hours into the night, and the admins are DRUNK. and it’s let slip just how much they know about ruby’s past, which makes him furious.

ruby leaves the room, betrayed, and goes to speak to maxie for any reassurance from this guy he trusts so much. they talk for a bit and ruby tries to breach the subject of groudon a bit, asking just how serious maxie is about this whole thing, maxie takes this as him faltering and questions just how loyal ruby is to team magma. he backtracks and assures him that he loves this place, because he does, and wants to help them, but ruby also kind of has to come to terms with how far he’s willing to go. The conversation escalates a bit as ruby tries to talk him down but maxie’s very out of it and comes off way more abrasive than he should, telling ruby that he regrets making him admin over blaise. this sends ruby over the edge and he leaves, going to his room.

At this point he’s manic, he feels this intense loyalty to team magma, but also this sense of justice telling him he can’t let them get away with controlling groudon. At the same time he’s also just fearful and angry and wants to leave, and so he packs his stuff, breaks into maxie’s office, steals both orbs, and leaves. he runs and runs until he reaches route 119 and finds sapphire, who’s camping there.

now sapphire is very hostile towards him and for good reason, he’s supposedly evil, but he manages to explain himself and while she’s still skeptical, he allows her to take his pokeballs temporarily and stay the night. for a while they’re both very wary of each other and she’s very hesitant to let her guard down around him but he’s completely willing to expose team magma plans to her, just as long as she doesn’t rat him out to the gym leaders.

they camp a bit more, make plans together, bond a bit, and ruby offhandedly mentions that he was interested in doing contests in the hoenn region but wasn’t able to pursue it because of everything that’s been happening. sapphire admits that she’s been going through a similar thing with the gym challenge, and tells him that while she’s can’t commit herself to that dream she’s planning to travel to verdanturf and reconnect with wally, which would give ruby the chance to compete. he’s very excited about this and goes with her, where he also meets wally for the first time.

she tells wally about what’s been going on in hoenn and he’s very eager to help, but sapph says that he probably shouldn’t leave town for his health. this leads to all three of them LIVING TOGETHER!!!! while there’s still natural disasters happening and the teams running rampant (sapph and wally don’t know ruby has the orbs, wally doesnt know ruby’s from team magma) they actually are able to have a fun coming of age summer!

but by ruby’s birthday team magma is closing in on the orbs location and ruby is very very anxious about this. the three of them are still hanging out but there’s more grunts in the area and the presence of the orbs are really weighing on him, until one night wally comes to call him for dinner and ruby panics and drops the orbs on the floor.

wally walks in, sees these, and is rightfully very confused and upset. ruby swears he has reason for them and begs wally to trust him, and he gives him the benefit of the doubt in thanks ruby gives him celebi as a parallel to ralts.

not even days later the entirety of team magma is swarming verdanturf and sapph has called the gym leaders to the area in order to subdue the teams. ruby’s about to run, but when suddenly he sees blaise running around in an admin uniform, he becomes extremely jealous and ends up confronting them all. this is a TERRIBLE decision and obviously they all corner him, ruby asks why he was replaced, if he was really only chosen because of his dad, he only really wants answers but then a grunt notices the orbs and his bag and it becomes very serious.

suddenly he’s being attacked on all sides and starting to feel very cornered. sapph and wally realise what’s happening and run out right at the moment ruby pulls out the orbs.

(gore warning!)

sapph is PISSED. ruby’s not only completely destroyed her plans but also has been lying to her for ages. the contact with the orb is waking up groudon and kyogre and tremors and floods are beginning to happen around verdanturf. gym leaders begin to show up slowly and now in being surrounded ruby ends up absorbing the red orb and being possessed by groudon.

unfortunately ruby is 11 and extremely stubborn! and while he does in part want to use groudon to drive everyone away, he also doesn’t want to help team magmas plans, and also doesnt want the orb destroying him from the inside. so in trying to will groudon both back underground and out of his arm, the force of it causes the orb to explode inside his body, causing his arm to shoot off. and norman sees ALL of it.

and so he runs onto the battlefield, seeing his son for the first time in a year, and rushes him to a hospital. the red orb has exploded and thus there’s now no way to control groudon, that’s now gone back underground, and maxie is very frantically searching through all the blood for any fragments he can find. He finally stands and leaves without saying a word to any of his teammates, leaving them without guidance.

Archie, however, has taken the chance to steal the blue orb and fully control kyogre, turning the situation into a battle to stop team aqua. Sapph’s still upset of course but now she, wally, and the gym leaders (minus norman) are working with team magma to try and defeat kyogre, but before long central hoenn is almost destroyed.

Ruby’s been taken to the hospital but the orb took too much of a toll on his body and he’s died before he could be really helped at all. Everything has gone to shit and now wally has this very heavy weight in his pocket in the form of everyone’s favorite,,, celebi. the deus ex machina is included yeah. BUT!!!! celebi reverses time but goes to visit ruby in the instant of his death. they’re in the time warp and they have a wordless exchange where celebi offers to reverse ruby’s injuries and restore the orb, but ruby decides to decline this and keep the orb shattered in exchange for his arm. and yeah! he wakes up at home where his mom is by his bedside. sapphire is still very rightfully upset and while she is VERY worried for him, is physically too mad to visit.

there’s intentionally many plot points not wrapped up because i have an epilogue that’s almost the size of the main story and also this would be too long with every point i wanted to explain (this is insanely abridged) but that’s the main bit! the epilogue focuses much less on ruby and it’s mostly about/covers the equivalent of mirage island/juan, sapph’s gym challenge/very unhealthy mental state, each admin but especially blaise, amber, wally’s training, the salamence incident (we don’t have time to unpack all THAT during the fight!), wallace, etc. but ruby does get a lot in regards to learning to live as an amputee, trying to function in society as a criminal, getting along with his parents, etc!

umm but yeah! lmk if y’all have any questions i love to yap. sorry again this took so long, i’ve written this in my head/physically at least 7 times lol. i’m still trying to figure out how to work in emerald/oras so if y’all have any ideas lmk…

i also tried to draw out parts of this but i did not get far so y’all can have a couple lol

[rottenpumpkin13]

since fireworks are on my mind (4th of July and all), what if there was a kind of similar fireworks festival in Banora or some small village and they either couldn't afford fireworks/the fireworks stopped working so Genesis used materia to make fireworks for the little kids!

ps, hope you're having a good time, stay safe in general, lots of love!!! ♥️♥️♥️

• Sephiroth fills his mouth with rice the moment Angeal drops the accusation, sensing his opinion on the matter will be asked and wanting no part of it: "You only ever take missions when you know there will be witnesses and news coverage to hail you as a hero." • Genesis is fuming. How dare his friend accuse him of vanity? As if they hadn’t climbed the ranks of SOLDIER together, enduring every trial side by side until they earned their titles. Genesis: “Do you agree, Sephiroth?” *Sephiroth responds by shoving an entire panko prawn in his mouth* • Genesis will have none of it. N o n e of it. He's now dead set on proving them both wrong, and as a rebuttal, he takes on a reconnaissance mission in a small village near the Fort Condor region. It’s simple and lacks flair: investigate a clandestine group selling stolen materia and report the findings. • The only interesting thing about this village is that his mission coincides with a major festival. He sees the locals bustling with preparations upon arrival. But he has to keep a low profile and can't reveal himself, which is a pity—he would have relished the awed stares and excited children flocking around him. • The mission is too easy: he locates the group almost immediately, operating on the outskirts of town near the woods where the festival preparations are underway. They’re selling rare materia to the locals at exorbitant prices. Genesis knows he could simply report it and be done, then return home to finish his latest novel. • But it's so terribly simple that he decides to take matters into his own hands. A skirmish breaks out between him and the group. Although Genesis successfully apprehends each one and confiscates the materia, a blast from the magic hits the nearby shed storing all the fireworks, rendering them unusable. • Now his cover is blown. The children and locals are indeed awed and excited to see him. But he can’t help but notice the children’s disappointment as they see the ruined fireworks, their sad eyes tugging at his heartstrings. It wasn’t his fault— how could he have known the fireworks were stored there? • He understands why this is devastating. He used to get so excited when the harvest festival back in Banora rolled around because the village would always put on the biggest fireworks show. He had fond memories of climbing to Angeal’s rooftop to watch them, while Angeal’s mother made apple chips for them.

• No, he would be damned by the goddess before he ever spoiled the fun for these kids. • Genesis puts his proficiency with magic to good use and uses materia to orchestrate the grandest, flashiest fireworks display imaginable. He pulls out all the stops—varying colors, styles, and formations, even crafting shapes like chocobos, moogles, and other fun designs that the children love. Genesis goes a step further by taking requests for custom displays, seething with quiet rage when a child suggests a firework depicting Sephiroth battling Bahamut. • The festival is saved, and he feels great! There were no news crews or cameras to capture the moment, proving Angeal’s claim wrong. Ha! Take that Angeal! • Until the following lunch hour where the trio are once again in the mess hall, except this time Angeal is smugly slapping down a newspaper on the table. The headline reads: "Heroic SOLDIER Genesis Saves Festival with Spectacular Fireworks Display!" followed by a candid picture taken of him laughing with the children. Angeal: “You just couldn’t help yourself, could you?” Genesis: “What!? It’s not like I wanted this! They took the photo of me, look, I’m not even posing for it!” Angeal: “Your vanity knows no bounds.” Genesis: “This is ridiculous. Sephiroth, what do you think about this?” *Sephiroth responds by chugging his ramen*

[turtleations]

Interview with t.o.L. (Artist unit consisting of saito and kuno, involved with LEMONed as art designers) (summarized)

Published in the hide BIBLE (by Akemi Oshima) 2008

Note: t.o.L. (trees of Life) are an artistic duo consisting of Kuno Makiko and Saito Kei, who published work under the LEMONed label and further worked for LEMONed on the design side of things. They are the creators of the cartoon cat TAMALA who stars in their 2002 movie “TAMALA2010 – a punk cat in space”.

Note 2: For this interview I am falling back on the “summary” format I have used for all the long interviews so far. Again, much of it is still a rather direct translation.

Note 3: I once again use names and honorifics or lack thereof as used by the people talking. (They are somewhat inconsistent in this one.)

For starters, please tell us about your first meeting with hide-san.

(kuno) In 1995, they were in London to make the PV for their song “one day for maria”, where they showed their work to an acquaintance and it somehow ended up being seen by someone from HEADWAX. It made its way to hide, who liked it so much he arranged for a meeting soon after.

(saito) They were talking to London’s EMI UK at the time, but met with hide-san as soon as they returned to Japan in January 1996. He was recording in a studio in Hitachizaka then, and right at their first meeting said, “I’m making a label called LEMONed, how about we work together?” He let them listen to his song “BACTERIA”, which he was recording just then, and it was completely different from what they had imagined. They had not expected it to be music they liked that much. The fact that the label he was creating wasn’t just for the music but also for the covers, videos etc. was exciting to them.

(kuno) When she saw the video for “BACTERIA” for the first time, she was surprised and simply thought it was cool. She had been mostly listening to foreign music until then and had not expected there to be people making such awesome stuff in Japan as well. That was one of the reasons why she wanted to work with hide.

Did you live in London at that time?

(kuno) On and off.

You talked about making music and PVs, but what was your main activity until then?

(saito) Mainly TV-commercials and advertisements, but he was ready to move on to the next thing. The song “one day for maria” (trees of Life) that was entered into the LEMONed compilation, and the PV for it, were something they had made for themselves, completely out of their own volition without having been commissioned for it. Them making the music, the video, and the graphics themselves must have been in line with what hide-san wanted to do with LEMONed.

What was your impression when you met hide-san for the first time?

(kuno) He seemed like an amazingly delicate and ordinary boy. The massive gab between his unremarkable, sensitive impression and the strong impact left my “BACTERIA” was quite surprising.

(saito) To he honest, saito didn’t know X JAPAN well until then. When he met hide in person, the large gab between the wild energy of his works and the very delicate nature of the person making them was immediately captivating.

After this, you started creating things together?

(kuno) When they entered “one day for maria” into the LEMONed compilation, it led to them also being in charge of the entire art direction and all the visual work for LEMONed. Then the LEMONed-log, hide-san’s log, and the pamphlet with LEMONed’s introduction and so on.

(saito) hide had probably always meant to create an image that was different from that of X JAPAN’s HIDE. To realize that, they talked at lot and often had exchanges late at night. Hide would suddenly reach out in the middle of the night because he thought of a song or an idea had come to him. He was now operating in a different genre than the one he was used to, and that’s where t.o.L. came in. When they talked about what to do for the jacket of the first LEMONed compilation, hide-san brought up Salvador Dali: What if they didn’t use one of the artists images but rather an image of the artist himself? Kuno then picked that idea up, asking, should they go for a model of the old man? What environment should he be in? Hide came up with radical ideas, they played them back with their own input, like playing catch ball, and it the end the photographer, stylists, lighting made it a reality. That’s how LEMONed worked. Saito took a step back from creating songs and live performances as part of trees of Life then, he sees now.

(kuno) They worked on the overall image of ELMONed together, but t.o.L.’s general involvement was more in the visual department.

(saito) hide was someone who had a lot of ideas, but those ideas were often absurd. Dali, for example, was already dead then. In saito’s opinion, hide was way ahead of his time. t.o.L. also made the pamphlet for the [then] recent “hide Memorial Summit”. While hide himself is gone, everyone wants him to be an icon. He was an extremely imaginative person, the kind of person who wants to use Dali, and influenced Saito a lot as a person. Saito didn’t think it possible for this design idea to be well received, but it was.

(kuno) The idea of using Salvador Dali was fresh and unexpected and she wanted to turn it into something real using her own imagination.

(saito) Hide probably wanted to do something that could be enjoyed even by all the people who didn’t know the painter Salvador Dali. Saito, who had himself operated under Dali’s name, felt that difference back then. While hide lived in a fun and insane world, he also wanted to translate that craziness for the fans who loved him. It’s hard to believe that that was ten years ago already. To saito, it feels recent.

(kuno) To create the cover for the recent live album, she listened to the recordings once more and dug up old photographs. They don’t feel old at all, they feel fresh.

(saito) He thinks it’s funny that X JAPAN’s HIDE was well established, but it was the solo artist hide who created LEMONed whom they got involved with, and as a result, their relationship with him was somewhat unique. For fans from the X JAPAN era, that shift was probably unsettling, but to t.o.L., who joined halfway through, it was quite a different experience.

How exactly did hide-san influence you?

(saito) After hide passed away, they created the character of TAMALA and worked on that movie for about four years. During that period, he thought about something hide had said countless times: That there is a gab between an artist’s understanding of the fun and fascinating work they want to do, and the way the people viewing it in the end will perceive it. It’s not a question of choosing between your vision and what would bring people enjoyment, but of managing to do both.

(kuno) She thinks this is really important.

(saito) Recently, when he saw X JAPAN’s performances or the “hide Memorial Summit” and HIDE-san appears on screen, he felt like just another fan, even though they should have done these things together, thinking “He’s so cool!” or “He’s so cute!” hide’s greatness can be felt in the last glittering fragments he left behind. He was burning with ideals yet knew of the harshness of reality, and that’s what makes what he left behind so great and adorable, and it’s what made him special.

(kuno) She feels like there were a lot of terrible things that they can’t even imagine, yet hide’s songs and performances gave the impression of him always having fun. It may sound strange to put it like that, but it feels like he was playing with great seriousness. That’s what she also wants to do; it’s his influence on her.

(saito) Even when hide was at his absolute limit, he would ask his fans if they were entertained enough. It goes beyond his imagination. He heard this from someone else, but if the fans were to answer, “We’re not!”, hide would probably say, “Okay” and work even harder. Working with hide-san, Saito didn’t have a single bad experience.

(kuno) To put it differently, he was extremely considerate. He was so considerate of his staff and the people around him that she feared he would exhaust himself with it. On the other hand, he was reckless and playful, but he was also someone to take the initiative and lead everyone. It were his sensitivity and kindness that really left an impression.

Are there any episodes from when you were working together that left a particularly deep impression?

(saito) When they made the PV for “Beauty & Stupid”, he felt like there was a taste of the Showa-era [25. December 1926 – 7. January 1989] in it, so saito decided to go in the opposite direction with the styling. Hide said, “That’s cool, that’s really cool, but there are fans who sport their own pink hair, so can you include the part where I go “Ehehe” with the pink hair for me?” and saito thought, “Oh, sorry, I get it now.”

(kuno) The finished thing was super cute.

(saito) It really worked out well. Hide always wanted to go higher, and he wanted to take everyone with him when he went. Rather than going on his own, he always prioritized his fans.

(kuno) She thinks he was also playing around.

(saito) Really, he probably couldn’t keep himself entertained.

(kuno) For real.

(saito) He acted that way a lot, though, so it was kind of adorable.

“Beauty & Stupid” was reshot?

(saito) He just wanted to add some new footage but ended up redoing the whole thing. It was a fun project, through. And of course, on the day of the shoot, there was a broken foot… (laughs)

(kuno) For the shooting of “ROCKET DIVE”, everyone was supposed to cheerfully jump up, but hide had a broken foot.

(saito) He asked hide to pretend to fly and hide was happy to do so. Speaking of which, he thinks hide was a person who worked not only with his head but with his whole body. He wasn’t gig-headed at all; he was a physical person, and yet an extremely sensitive one. He was strange like that. (laughs)

What was it like when you came into the studio for “ROCKET DIVE”?

(saito) hide just smiled and said, “It broke”, and they looked at his foot and were like, “So it did.” It didn’t come as much of a surprise. Hide didn’t take his injury into consideration for its own sake, but he was conscious of how it affected their concept. He was someone who could adjust to circumstances and come up with new ideas on the spot, to make the best of any situation. And at LEMONed, they were used to accidents, those happened all the time. For saito it was educational, how even outrageous or unthinkable things could just happen.

(kuno) hide seemed like someone who had a clear idea from the beginning but didn’t get hung up on the details if someone else had input. If she came up with an idea, they would talk about it some, but after throwing her the ball, he wouldn’t say anything more. She doesn’t quite know why but thinks it’s because he trusted those he worked with to make something good. She wouldn’t have minded if he had actually told her so, too, but she’s grateful for the faith he put in her.

(saito) When saito was working at the office late at night, someone from HEADWAX might come and deliver audio data to him. When done with the pre-production of a song, hide wanted to let him listen to it right away. Saito now thinks he considered them friends within LEMONed and wanted to share the joy of creating a new work with them. He was like a child in this regard.

(uno) To her, hide had this childlike purity. In the dressing room of some event he’d suddenly start telling them about a baby monkey and how cute it had been. So small and so cute, he’d go on and on about that endlessly. It was adorable. (laughs)

Staff (Yamamoto): Recalls how hide said he wanted to see a baby monkey on some MTV program, so they went to a pet shop and he had one ride on his shoulder. He enjoyed that so much it seemed like he wanted to keep it.

(saito) This is something personal, but he often thinks about hide. When things are tough, he thinks about him and how he would handle it. He feels like hide set the standard for many things. They created a lot together, and hide send him his tapes and music right away. Maybe he was just being nice, but Saito feels like they connected as friends, as equals. When he remembers that, he realized just how important a person hide had been to him.

What prompted you to create TAMALA?

(saito) A lot of things. Saito had been thinking about what to do next as a creator even before hide-san passed away, but after what happened in 1998, he decided to make a movie. And so, he started. Of course, he wanted to show it to hide-san. He’s still working on it in 2008, but for him it was a natural progression to do this after he finished his work with LEMONed. It’s been 10 years, and LEMONed’s hide-san is still close to him.

(kuno) She thinks hide would really have wanted to see TAMALA. He wasn’t a model for her, but TAMALA, the main character of their story, is a cat who gets bullied and bullies right back, a flag bearer for everyone. In her mind, privately, there is a link to hide-san somewhere. TAMALA has been hurt but still carries the flag for everyone – a role model for Kuno.

Did you interact outside of work?

(saito) Not at all.

(kuno) They went out for drinks after work.

(saito) Just once for him, and not together with her. From the outside that must have seemed like he reasonably just didn’t want to go.

(kuno) This wasn’t something she got particularly hung up on.

(saito) That he got data and tapes in the middle of the night was enough for him; he didn’t think he needed to convey his feeling by getting drunk and going wild on top of that. Hide-san probably wanted to share some private time with them, but saito thought it was enough. Now he wishes he had spend more time with him. Hide-san was someone who worked in a very relaxed atmosphere and then went to treat those around him, but saito felt he always had to keep up the tension so he couldn’t go relax in his free time like that.

(kuno) They often worked until late at night and then went drinking. After hide passed away she wished she could have talked to him more and share the things she liked with him.

What kind of things?

(kuno) Just stuff like, “That jacket is nice, isn’t it?” Nothing special.

Other artist also often expressed that hide-san “didn’t have a lot to say about the work itself”.

(kuno) He must have had faith in them. Leaving their work to them without getting involved was just his style.

(saito) Beyond the concept, as long as they met his standard, he let his artists, musicians, and bands work independently. That was important to him. Creators had to be able to make their own decisions about their work. He had worked independently from the beginning, and so he wanted to give those around him the confidence to work independently as well. So saito feels that it was probably their own fault that they didn’t connect to him on a more private level. From his perspective, hide-san had almost no flaws – something that amazes him even now.

(kuno) This is not a flaw, but hide put so much energy into being kind and considerate to others that she worried about him, wondering how he could possibly balance it all.

(saito) He was like that.

(kuno) He was someone who was looking out for those behind him while everyone in front of him was having fun.

(saito) He only worked with hide-san for two years, and to be honest, he didn’t look back on it so far, immersed himself in making a movie to the point of blocking out everything else. About two years ago, he started reviewing hide’s work once more and found that it was not dated at all, especially “Pink Spider” and “ROCKET DIVE”, recognizing hide’s immense potential in it. He felt that way again when he got to make the jacket for RIZE’s cover of “Pink Spider”. But that was the potential within LEMONed. With X JAPAN and other bands there was a different kind of potential, so saito thinks he only got to see a potion of it. Even so, it influenced him.

You mentioned absurd ideas he had, do you remember any specific ones?

(kuno) There were no requests that were straight up impossible.

(saito) He was fixated on old men and women, using them to express a long span of time in his work. The idea to use old people on the jacket for “ever free” also came from him. “How about we use old people as icons in my work?”, he asked, and saito started to think about it. But hide didn’t stop at simply having old people, he took it to a point of amusement with old skinheads kissing. Then: “If they are skinheads, they should have tattoos on their heads.” Since they couldn’t do that in Japan, kuno-san went to L.A. for it.

(kuno) She figured it would be hard to find models willing to shave their head in Japan, so L.A. it was. When she held auditions for the job, the uncles and aunties were willing to save their heads right away. She figures that for older talent, the priority lay with getting a job. The auntie who had her hair set like a geisha for the audition came to the shooting completely bald.

(saito) And there they put on magic tattoos?

(kuno) With a writing brush.

(saito) He couldn’t go there, but asks if hide-san came.

(kuno) He said he would, but in the end he was too busy, so she went to show him the film after.

(saito) Did he leave the decision to her?

(kuno) He did.

(saito) Since “ever free” and “Pink Spider” were produced at the same time, they worked on them separately. He had a lot of fun with the PV for “Pink Spider” and how to make things look real using CG. As soon as the idea of old skinheads come up for “ever free”, he started to think about how to top it. Kuno said that there was nothing unreasonable being asked, but it was not exactly normal either.

Like skinhead tattoos. (laughs)

(saito) They had a discussion about what to do, since they both started at the same point and stage. It never reached a point where they had to reject something as impossible.

(kuno) It was hard, but it was fun. Since this was how he liked to do it, things kept spreading with ever more people suggesting, “Well, how about this?”

(saito) For “UGLY PINK MACHINE”, hide was really happy with the idea of the safety pins and the computer. There were things they couldn’t understand, of course, but those were two good years of moving in the same direction at LEMONed.

You also made various designs for the “hide Memorial Summit”, didn’t you?

(saito) Having to choose between doing a memorial of the past or presenting a look at a potential hide from the present day, he naturally went with the latter. Hide-san is gone and there is no telling what he would be like in 2008, but looking at a vast amount of photos, saito realized that there were many fans who wanted to see it anyway. He went with a version of LEMONed’s hide-san, but there were also a lot of fans of X JAPAN’s HIDE-san, and he tried to make everyone happy. Doesn’t know if it worked, but he put his heart into it.

(kuno) It was actually really fun. Because those old photos, especially the live ones, hadn’t been used much until then. After hide was gone, a lot of photos had been used in projects, but they only started to exhume the live footage then. Starting with the live albums, there are a lot of cool pictures, with him looking into the distance.

(saito) He had great eyes for that.

(kuno) You didn’t know if he was looking at the sky or elsewhere.

(saito) It was never sentimental.

(kuno) It made you want to look at whatever he was focusing on with him.

(saito) It gave you courage. The photo seemed to tell you that you can do more. That’s why he feels like it ended up being not only a memorial but also fun.

Is there anything you would like to tell hide-san?

(saito) He wants to meet him again. Only that. He doesn’t think this has anything to do with the occult, but he feels like he will meet him again someday, somewhere. That’s what he wants. And he wants to create something with him again. Anyway, every time he remembers hide-san, he looks forward with a positive attitude. So he wants to keep connecting to him through his work, dedicate something he made to him, and keep in contact this way.

(kuno) That’s how it is.

(saito) hide-san is present in the works he makes, in spirit if not in form, and he wants to be told by that work to “make more”.

(kuno) When she creates things, it gives her courage to know that someone like hide existed. She wants to make things that encourage others as well, just like him.